tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35083825389476004212024-03-13T16:37:46.024-04:00Silver Bullet CinemaHorror, Science Fiction, Fantasy and Cult Film ReviewsChance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-82137618397720383592013-06-27T17:40:00.004-04:002013-06-27T17:40:58.117-04:00For What It's Worth. BangBang. You're Dead. I'm going to start off by thanking anyone who reads this site & especially those who have been reading my foul-mouthed opinions from the myspace days. Not going to beat around the bush here. There was a time in the past, and for a short span recently, when I enjoyed giving my 2 cents about films. Hell, sometimes I still do but it's really few and far in between these days. I never had any lofty ambitions or thought that what I have to offer in this department is some type of novel approach or actually matters. I kind of did it to amuse myself and because people seemed to get a laugh out of it. Thing is, I don't enjoy it in a serious capacity. Never have. This was always more of me shooting off my mouth like I would around my friends.<div>
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I've come to the decision that I will not be expanding Silver Bullet Cinema. It shall remain what it is. Which is me randomly talking shit. SilverBulletCinema.com will become active as one of my production companies and will not be a review site. If you will indulge me, the following is a quick explanation. For what it's worth.<br /><div>
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I'm an actor. I'm a musician. I'm a writer of fiction. I love creating. I'm an artist. No, I don't use the word with any pompous levity. It's just a fact like a baker is a baker. I've been acting and making music for money my whole life; music starting from when I was barely a teen. I'm not into judging. Personally, it's hard enough to not criticize my own art and as an artist, being a serious critic of others does not play well in my sphere. It goes against me as a personality. I'm not into unwarranted and serious criticism and the more I thought about the opportunity presented to me to expand and possibly make a little scratch from it, the more I felt like a traitor. NOT saying critics are bad people. Some of my favorite people and friends are critics and though it may not seem like it, some of them are critics because they are absolutely in love with film or music. I have no personal problem with critics. The good ones keep us artists in check and help us improve constructively. I felt like a traitor because instead of moving forward at a personally important and opportune time for me as an artist, I would instead be criticizing others for their creations while adding nothing creatively myself. It's not what I live for and if you are not doing something you live for, you are wasting your life. </div>
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I will certainly jump on here and drop some snark randomly. I'll certainly be doing another 31 Nights of Horror and 5 From 31 article. No worries. Sincere thanks again to my readers. You guys and gals are rad to the maximum.</div>
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Much Love, </div>
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~Chance</div>
Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-31764835627556707032013-03-05T01:22:00.001-05:002013-03-05T01:23:11.654-05:00Dark Skies<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Rated <b><span style="color: red;">PG-13</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #6fa8dc;">DIRECTOR / WRITER:</span> Scott Stewart</div>
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<span style="color: #6fa8dc;">STARRING: </span>Keri Russell, Josh Hamilton, Dakota Goyo, Kaden Rockett, J.K. Simmons</div>
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<b><i><span style="color: lime;">CRITICAL SCORE:</span></i></b> <span style="color: red;"><b>6 / 10</b></span></div>
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<i><b><span style="color: lime;">BULLET POINTS: </span></b></i> <span style="color: red;"><b>7 / 10</b></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #ead1dc;">PLOT</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">Felicity has grown up, become a real-estate agent and lives in an a-typical le blanc de skin California suburban neighborhood with her ball and chain and two little cusses (Dakota Goyo & Kadan Rockett). Her husband (Josh Hamilton) is out of work and the family is grippin' hard on some first world problems. But what's this? Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.. err, in the home. Totes McGoats. What or who is the cause of these wackadoo antics and do they use gloves when twiddle-dippin' your starfish?</span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #ead1dc;">TRAILER TRASH</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">The ads looked decent. I'm always up for a possible close encounter of the third kind. Fire In The Sky made me wear a tin foil hat when I was a kid, can you relate? Horror flicks with a dash of science-fiction or vice versa is a fave sub-genre of mine. John Carpenter's The Thing is fucking cinematic fucking genius but I'm getting sidetracked. I haven't seen a good Sci-Fi spookfest in a dick year, so I was minor stoked to see this. Also, Signs was hella fuckin' rad and if you aren't on board with that, well.. that's just like your opinion, man. So, did Dark Skies try to abduct the awesomeness or did I get beamed into T'Pol's quarters for a skimpy clothed Vulcan neuropressure session?</span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #ead1dc;">LOCK & LOAD</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">Far out, hosers. Dark Skies is pretty decent. The flick does take awhile to get you in the mix. It's a slow burn but not really a burn. It's a slow sizzle. Dark Skies doesn't suffer from wonky dialogue or any of the normal issues that can come along with films of it's kind. Scott Stewart does a solid job directing, the cinematography is spot on and I was mass pleased about the quality level. The plot and pacing cruises right along and although it took a hot minute for me to get engaged in the flick, at no time was I bored. <span style="text-align: center;"> </span></span></div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-W2ZojXk3lfQ/UTVqMwgl3mI/AAAAAAAAAkY/S-iMKmoeYtM/s1600/DarkSkies2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: #a2c4c9;"><img border="0" height="216" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-W2ZojXk3lfQ/UTVqMwgl3mI/AAAAAAAAAkY/S-iMKmoeYtM/s320/DarkSkies2.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">I'm gonna' whinge for a sec about the vanilla look of the family's joint. The spot had no character, almost to the point of being clinical in some places. The set design and art direction were tuff every where else, so this was more of just a poor choice. There's an alternate 70's style house that's used for some scenes and even though that pad was pretty bare (it was a home for sale that Keri Russell's character was the agent for), it was sportin' a fuckton more character than the Barrett Fam's home. This blows because the Barret casa is where the film spends a lot of time. I get what they were going for but the model house ambiance just didn't fit the family. This aspect actually took me out of the movie a scoshe because it felt awkward to be so whitewashed in the deco. The actors gave their characters personality, so their home should have reflected it. You might be thinking I need to take a red here but the surroundings (set design, art direction) really affect the vibe of the film and Dark Skies lacked a sufficient tension big time. The art design in the home helped destroy any suspense that was created in other ways. </span></div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-nja8w1knEXY/UTVq-1Z6HTI/AAAAAAAAAlw/-CQA_zvE83U/s1600/DarkSkies9.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span style="color: #a2c4c9;"><img border="0" height="204" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-nja8w1knEXY/UTVq-1Z6HTI/AAAAAAAAAlw/-CQA_zvE83U/s320/DarkSkies9.jpg" width="320" /></span></a><span style="color: #a2c4c9;">The actors all turned in solid performances. The dialogue was awesome, especially between the two brothers. Kadan and Dakota did a fantastic job in their roles and built a very strong bro bond. "Lunar Base to Command Control, over." For serious. Keri Russell was good but I kind of wished her character had a little more personality. Not sure that has much to do with the actress as it was clear the filmmakers wanted to tow the vanilla fam routine. But no hassling her, Russell is on point with delivering the performance. Ditto for Josh Hamilton. He had more meat to chew on in Dark Skies though, so his character comes off as more layered and fershure dealing with some straight up dichotomy. Got popped in the ocular as well, but lucky dude, no eye-jammy. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">Dark Skies takes the less is more approach and you goobers know I have two fuckin' tickets to that ride. Especially in horror the slow burn and less is more is nearly a guarantee a film will actually build tension. But it has to pay off in the scare department. This flick didn't blow my skirt up per say but it did enough right to buy me breakfast. I'm not recommending you drop your shit right now and hit the theatre on this but I'm not going to curb this film either. If you are way into the whole alien abduction slow burn vibe, I'd say scope it out. It's pretty tight but it's not really the tits.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">Lacked sufficient vibage. May I have a side order of tension please?</span></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">I don't remember the score. Prolly' not a good thing. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">Set design and art direction on the Barrett family home had zero personality. Fuckin' brunie unsalted cracker shenaynays.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">I'm calling Dark Skies the fuck out on the fucking CGI eyeless gag. Applicable effects. Look it up, sons of bitches. Fuck. It would have looked so much creepier. If I was a CGI bountyhunter, I would spinning heel kick you in the bag, rip your throat out Roadhouse-style and toss your body in a piss river.</span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #ead1dc;">CRUCIAL RAD</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">J fuckin' K fuckin Simmons y'all. Took a very important character with not much screen time and nailed that shit. Matter of factolas, if this character didn't deliver, Dark Skies would have fell flatter than a week old rootbeer in the back of the fridge. Simmons dropped some gravitas on us. Dig it, Brohiminy Cricket.</span></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Tch2y46M3zs/UTVqNhCkGHI/AAAAAAAAAk4/5MQWBGTWWwo/s1600/DarkSkies4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: #a2c4c9;"><img border="0" height="246" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Tch2y46M3zs/UTVqNhCkGHI/AAAAAAAAAk4/5MQWBGTWWwo/s320/DarkSkies4.jpg" width="320" /></span></a><span style="color: #a2c4c9;">Ambiguity and the less is more path is employed to great effect here.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">There's a little spot that happens during the fade out. Boom. Crucial.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">There's an honesty in the delivery of both the way the actors portray their characters and in the writing. I'd add the direction in that mix as well. When the sitch finally gets full on kirked out, you're there specifically because the build satisfied the factors.</span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #ead1dc;">SPLATTER FACTOR</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">Rash! A rash! There's an eye gag where they should have taze-shocked us in the taint. Not much goo here. Dark Skies is more about suspense building. Gore isn't needed here. </span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #ead1dc;">THE KILLSHOT</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #a2c4c9;">Dark Skies is above average. Truthfairy. It's solid on quality, story, dialogue, cinematography, etc and does a damn good job using ambiguity, holding just enough back on screen, to build some decent tension. I can bitch about a couple of aspects that I feel undermined the suspense of this film. I was never wigged out enough to start searching my body for implants and run screaming into an underground bunker when I saw bright lights. Dark Skies does a great job staying grounded in reality and it was ace how the premise of the film is treated with believable levity. The acting was dead on as well. So, okay, Dark Skies didn't beam me into T'Pols quarters (when this happens, the review will look like this: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) but I did think this flick was minor gnarly. I recommend hitting the cinema to the genre fans. Otherwise, grab it when it hits Blu. Bag your face with a dumptruck!</span></div>
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Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-87217564428142345822013-03-03T19:24:00.001-05:002013-03-03T20:36:27.194-05:00Silent Hill: Revelation<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="color: #e69138;">DIRECTOR / WRITER:</span> Michael J. Bassett<br />
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<span style="color: #cccccc;">Fuck. There's a cult trapped by an evil presence, there are some demons and shit massacring folks, there's an abducted father (Sean Bean) who was trying to keep his daughter (Adelaide Clemens) out of Silent Hill and she doesn't know who she really is (it's important though) and is like, fuck it, I'm going to Silent Hill to save my Dad. Then there's a dude (Kit Harrington) who is like, fuck it, you're hot, I shall accompany you on this bananas expedition. That's the basic setup in my mongoloid gibberish hand scrawl digit button mashing remembrance matrix.</span><br />
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">TRAILER TRASH</span></b><br />
<span style="color: #cccccc;">I go to Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Hollywood every year and the Silent Hill Revelation maze this last year was not too shabby. There were bloody pink bunnies and skin-wad-faced nurses in skimpy outfits swinging shit at my peripherals in the dark and some type of mannequin situation. Can't say I remember jack shit about the trailer for this. I thought the first Silent Hill movie was decent but I'm not like a card carrying member of the Silent Hill bukakay club. The original video game has a badass story premise. I know that. So, pretty much a blank slate going in other than the fun I had cruising around the maze at HHN Hollywood. Did Silent Hill Revelation sneak under my radar because it was turd traveling up wind or did my soul urinate itself on the rapture ride in Silent Hill's Revelation coaster?</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cccccc;">A lot of people worked hard on this film. No disrespect to you. Now that's out of the way. Buckle your pink parts down to the seat you fuckin' hicks because Todd Bob is cranking up this rusty shitbucket of a review. Is this film a fucking comedy? Is someone fucking with me here? This slut was hysterical. Look, I'm in a cussy mood you little snatch tits, so fuckin' pre-fuckin'-pare for the rape-massacre of the vibratory knobholes of your personal disgusting inward monkey voice dialogue as I slice the nipples off of this shitpiss diarrhea we call American English. For cock's sake. What are we here for? This cinematic dingle berry, Silent Hill: Revelation. I don't know. Maybe seeing this in 3D would be so absolutely fucking mesmerizing that my brain would jitter and mindgasm, creating an ultra-dimensional wave of pure bliss, blasting invisible microscopic atom-splitting sperm through every pore in my skin, impregnating the ba-fuckin-gillions of particles in the very air around me with babies made of glittering unicorn farts, fireworks, blushing cheeks of porn stars and twelve fried pickles on a mink towel and crack the very existence of reality giving birth to a reverse apocalypse.. but I doubt it. I bet it sucks in 3D too.</span><br />
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Seriously. What a fuckin' mess. Welcome to recap central, where nutstitched in the first half hour is an overwrought painful retelling of events we've seen in previous films. Silent Hill: Retelliation. Maybe it'll be one of those films that you watch again later, knowing you're in for a steaming stream of piss in the eyes BUT THIS TIME you wear sunglasses and a protective pissbag covering and voi-bitchass-la, you like golden showers when there's no piss on the skin. Or not. Sometimes horrible flicks are just funny entertainment the second time around. I'm just going to pretend that Radha Mitchell and Sean Bean aren't in the movie. I'll just excise that from the internal circuitry. Malcolm McDowell. What. The. Fuck. Are. You. Doing? You were in A Clockwork Orange. Stop dickholing your legacy with an anal mace. I tried to take a shit out of a tree once when I was a kid and an adult saw me, came outside and was like, what the fuck are you doing and I tried to convince him I had no clue what he was talking about. I was 5. I did a better job acting than you did here. And you're fucking legendary, mate. Carrie-Ann Moss or next door neighbor's mom dressed as S&M fairy Gandalf?</span><br />
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CGI twittle piss. Also, the applicable effects are no good when I can actually see the glue and lines of the prosthetic pieces on the actors. Lop off a dolphin's nose and punch a sea turtle with an ice pick. What was that mannequin spider vampire cat teethed anus hole gynecological kamasutra experiment thing supposed to be? Mannequin 3: The Reckoning. Where's Kim Catrall? This movie looked like a polished cartoon created by an absolute maniac who, in fact, is himself, a cartoon. Do they make tranqs for such a being?</span><br />
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Dialogue. Dear fuck, did anyone actually read the script before greenlighting this digital genital wart farm? Hating Facebook was mentioned three times in about a seven minute span. Passive Aggressive Ad Campaign? The fucking Seal of Metatron!! Where's Optimus Prime? "Is that a gang sign?" says the cop. You mean the bloody satanic looking seal dripping on the wall? I don't know. If I show you my hand, is it a toast cobra? The stars you see when vomiting from alcohol poisoning are definitely a window to another galaxy. Silent Hill: Incompetent Money Grab 3D. Nice "Boss Fight" BTW. Like Hellraiser fisting Mortal Kombat in a gay leather Nazi bunker.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cccccc;">You just read it. I'm not one to kick a horse when it's down but *BOFF!* in the goolies.</span><br />
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I hate seeing good actors in swill. That's part of the risks an actor takes every single time he or she does a film. Lots of good actors in this. I'd say I felt bad for you, but you are actually working. So. There's that.</span><br />
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">CRUCIAL RAD</span></b><br />
<span style="color: #cccccc;">Adelaide Clemens. I like you. You've got chops and talent. None of this is on you. You and Kit kept me watching. Looking forward to seeing you in an actual film. PS - You're cute.</span><br />
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Kit Harrington. Listen, Stark, I like you too. I know you are a really good actor (you turn in amazing performance after amazing performance on Game of Thrones) and I think you showed it here, even in this atrocity. Again, this is not on you. PS - You are also cute. My "sister" said so.</span><br />
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">SPLATTER FACTOR</span></b><br />
<span style="color: #cccccc;">CG blood. Gallons of Pixels. Real fake blood too. Mutilations galore, lopped off digits, bullet wounds, weirdo skin slurping. Yeah. Gushers. Too polished pretty to be disturbing though.</span><br />
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">THE KILLSHOT</span></b><br />
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<span style="color: #cccccc;">Like a passenger in my own full throttle whore train mental ward of a mind, I laughed until my starfish blew out of my pants leg writing this. So, I put forth that I am not actually in control of my digits as they type this twattle. Clearly, fucking Satan wrote this review. Silent Hill: Revelation sucks a cantaloupe out of a squirrel's urethra. It was like cruising through a haunted house created by a mentally deficient but somehow living swarm of fart cloud creatures that were birthed by passing through a Hollywood agent's cocaine vegan bubble gut at a flea-market horror convention from noshing on a 'Spooky Willy' green spinach spanakopita. The Silent Hill franchise deserves better and so do horror fans. Much better. I liked the lead actors. I'll say that. And there is the slight possibility that in this film's complete and utter failure, a future viewing will endear it in it's hilarious awfultasticness. Wait. Is this a comedy? Because I'm telling you, this motherfucker is funny. I upped it's score on entertainment value. Like watching two stutterers consonant fight over a pool of B's, P's, S's and T's. B,B,Buh,B,BuhBuh,B, Boy, th-that, S,S,Su,S,S,Suh,Suh,Suck,S,S, Sucked.</span></div>
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Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-31514163958125148772013-03-03T04:06:00.001-05:002013-03-03T04:07:39.906-05:00The Awakening<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span id="goog_835718568"></span><span id="goog_835718569"></span>Rated <b><span style="color: red;">R</span></b><br />
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<span style="color: #76a5af;">DIRECTOR / WRITER:</span> Nick Murphy<br />
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<span style="color: #76a5af;">STARRING:</span> Rebecca Hall, Dominic West, Imelda Staunton, Isaac Hempstead Wright<br />
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<span style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b><i>CRITICAL SCORE:</i></b></span><b><span style="color: red;"> 7 / 10</span></b><br />
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<span style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b><i>BULLET SCORE:</i></b> </span><b><span style="color: red;">7 / 10</span></b><br />
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<i>*<span style="color: #f1c232;">PREFACE</span> - <span style="color: #6fa8dc;">As you peruse this article, your inner-monologue should be construed in a strong proper British accent. Bite your arm off!</span>*</i><br />
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<b><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">PLOT</span></b><br />
England. 1921. Florence Cathcart (Rebecca Hall), an educated woman (for shame!), frigidly goes about her personal business of debunking ghostly hoaxes and revealing con artists. Enter Robert Mallory (Dominic West) who represents a boys boarding school in the quiet countryside of Cumbria. At this preparatory, the legendary ghost of a murdered lad is apparently responsible for frightening pupils quite literally to death. Robert invites Florence to assess the situation around Holiday. Tish Tosh.<br />
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<b><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">TRAILER TRASH</span></b><br />
Rebecca Hall is properly delicious. Enjoyed her work in both The Town & The Prestige. Dominic West is a right strong actor and attacked the block all over Centurion and John Carter. So, yeah, I bloody hell enjoyed the trailer for The Awakening. I predicted a well acted film at the very least and hoped that the story would be more than perfunctory. The Awakening did seem, in most aspects, well done. My queries before sauntering into the theater were this: Will tomfoolery of a preternatural or supernatural sort transpire? Will Tom Foolery show up at all; the cunt? How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?!!<br />
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<b><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">LOCK & LOAD</span></b><br />
I'm not the blinkered sort of fellow that doesn't enjoy his spooky cinema with some sophistication and class. The Awakening is a high caliber film on all fronts. From Nick Murphy's crisp direction, stunning scenery, beautiful location, sets, costumes and spot on attention to detail, this period piece never misses it's footing. The Awakening is a class act film all the way around.<br />
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I'm personally taken with the attention to detail, especially in regards to the attitude of our characters within the context of the era. The shadow of the atrocities of World War I hang heavily upon the tapestry of our players motivations and emotional context. This aspect is not something that is easy to play as an actor. Regardless, the feeling permeates through the lens and is well accomplished.<br />
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The performances are strong here. Dominic West has been beyond solid in every film I've seen him in. Imelda Staunton is also a consummate professional and I've no doubt, could teach a master class on subtlety. Rebecca Hall anchors the piece and gives it a spark. She easily has the most screen time and never once betrays her character's complex emotional journey as Florence susses out the truth, often at her own mental peril. I give special credit here to young actor Isaac Hempstead Wright, who us American fans know quite well as Bran Stark on Game of Thrones. Without spoiling the lot, I'll say that he does an impeccable job with his character, who could have easily came off as an annoying whinging little prat. Instead we get a boy who we identify with that embodies a plethora of varied motivations. Cheers, man.<br />
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The story of The Awakening is somewhat of a different take on, or at least an idea in the same wheelhouse as, a couple of other films I won't name; again in regard to spoiling any tricks. I did enjoy the film overall and rather liked the plot. A gripe can be had that The Awakening is reminiscent of something else, so the experience overall was dampened in that regard. It's a case of previous movie knowledge desensitizing an audience and somewhat castrating the fright factor of the film. The Awakening has some issues in it's final act but it doesn't go all pear-shaped. It's a solid and entertaining film from start to finish.<br />
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<b><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">PICKING BONES</span></b><br />
The creepy vibe should have had it's knob turned to eleven. It was at maybe five.<br />
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Needed some suspense. Not much in the way of original scares either.<br />
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Not to be repetitious, but The Awakening doesn't set itself apart as strongly as it needs to from it's predecessors.<br />
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<b><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">CRUCIAL RAD</span></b><br />
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In a genre where the majority of flicks commonly go sixes and sevens and then hook a left into complete shite, the overall quality of The Awakening must be commended. Stone the crows, I don't give a sweet fanny adams about how many sods throw a spanner in the works coz it makes for entertaining viewing sometimes. However, I'm not going to pull your todger and tell you The Awakening takes the biscuit either. It's sharp as class. That's the point.<br />
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Rebecca Hall has an innately likable quality and I really dig her acting chops. Yeah, and she's straight fucking sexy too, so I dig those chops as well.<br />
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<b><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">SPLATTER FACTOR</span></b><br />
A smattering here, a smack in the gob there, a pool of plasma. Nothing too graphic to lose your lunch over. Pretty restrained and only in a couple of scenes. Not really necessary in this film.<br />
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<span style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>THE KILLSHOT</b></span><br />
The Awakening is worth a butchers on quality alone. You're not going to go arse over tit, but this flick is better than average. Rebecca Hall and Dominic West are fantastic leads here. If this film had come out about fifteen years ago, it would have kicked all of you cunts straight in the goolies. Alas, we are traveling a well trodden path. Don't let that dissuade you though. I wouldn't call the film stodgy. Giving The Awakening a go is like bumming an old flame; familiar, not earth shattering, but a hot knackering nonetheless. And you never know, she may even have a few new tricks up her sleeve. Also, did I mention Rebecca Hall?<br />
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<br />Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-44950596179830643342013-03-02T17:03:00.002-05:002013-03-03T04:37:06.485-05:00House At The End Of The Street<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Rated <span style="color: red;"><b>PG-13</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #c27ba0;">DIRECTOR:</span> Mark Tonderai <span style="color: #c27ba0;">STARRING:</span> Jennifer Lawrence, Max Thieriot, Elisabeth Shue</div>
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<i><b><span style="color: lime;">CRITICAL SCORE:</span></b></i> <span style="color: red;"><b>6 / 10</b></span> <i><b><span style="color: lime;">BULLET POINTS: </span></b></i> <span style="color: red;"><b>5 / 10</b></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #f1c232;">PLOT</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">A quite young looney dudette shreds off her mommy and daddy's mortal coils and goes missing. Fast forward to disenfranchised hot mother / daughter combo moving into the house next door to the town pariah, the brooding son who has inherited his dead 'rents house... and that house is at the end of that street, y'all. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #f1c232;"><b>TRAILER TRASH</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">Here's what I remember from the trailer. Jennifer Lawrence is upset, hot and wearing a dirty tank top. So, SOLD, in other words. Again, missed a lot of movies at the theater this year due to shenanigans. A few friends with similar taste in movies told me House sucked. Me, I think Jennifer Lawrence is rad as fuck. Yes, she was awesome in Winter's Bone. But I don't mind telling you I've had a small crush ever since I saw her doing her press run before The Hunger Games. She's snarky, unaffected, majorly talented, easy on the eyes and the list goes on. There was no way I was not going to check this flick out. Honestly though, I only did because Lawrence is a really good actress. I was pretty much a clean slate going in, either way. So, did Jennifer sing me a siren song or, like the Talking Heads, should we be burnin' down the house?...</span></div>
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<span style="color: #f1c232;"><b>LOCK & LOAD</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">All right, all right, all right. This is the deal. House is actually not particularly horrible. This is a horror movie with training wheels. It's what a person who doesn't like scary movies can tolerate without waking up crying in their front yard with a poo stain on the back of their gown. I would kind of place this one in the odd category of "Horror For Beginners". My two cents is that Lawrence still hasn't done a real honest to genre horror film.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">There is nothing new here that you haven't seen before, especially for genre fans. All of the supporting characters are your typical cast of offenders: the jocks, the nerds, the popular crowd, the arty kids, etc. The plot, setup, theme and story aren't pushing any new boundaries but aren't awful. It's pretty middle of the road fare. Nonetheless, Tonderai and crew do a solid job with what they are working with. The cinematography is gorgeous and Tonderai keeps things flowing at a good pace. The technical side of the film is well executed and precise. I would have loved to have seen what this director and crew could have done with a more inspired story.</span></div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-uoWdvrwulSM/UTJj5PoMciI/AAAAAAAAAgc/R00irhhZ-YQ/s1600/HouseATEOTSStill2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-uoWdvrwulSM/UTJj5PoMciI/AAAAAAAAAgc/R00irhhZ-YQ/s320/HouseATEOTSStill2.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="color: #ffe599;">The performances of the main cast are all solid but the notable exceptions that rise above here are Max Theriot and, no surprise, Jennifer Lawrence. Theriot does a bang up job giving his character some layers beyond what is on the page. Being an actor, I'm honestly tougher on performances generally speaking. I'm especially tough when I see a character I would have been a great fit to play type-wise. So, put that in your pipe and smoke it. Taste the flavor. Coz' I'm saying Theriot did some fine work. Again though, would have loved to see what he could have done with a better written character. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">I'm not going to write off Jennifer Lawrence doing a great job like it's expected. Every role is a different challenge and I especially commend her for being stellar here because I don't think she had a lot to work with on the page. I'm not saying this script sucks eggs. I'm saying the script seems very vanilla bland mediocre unbitchin' non-non-crucial. So big props to Lawrence here for creating a compelling character I was actually interested in. Case in point, Elisabeth Shue, who I think is pretty ace, is totally wasted in this film. They should have given her character something to gnaw on because she would have rocked it out big time.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #f1c232;"><b>PICKING BONES</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">Some plot holes broke my ankles when I was strolling around. When House rolls credits, there are some backstory technicalities that cannot be frivolously explained away. Kind of falls apart if you think about it for a second. So maybe don't.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">Police procedure. Look, I'm not too much of a fucking dillhole stickler. I let a lot of shit go. But when a character does shit that is wookies on Endor, I call shenanigans. The least of which, but probably more important, is that the actor playing the cop (Gil Bellows - who I give kudos for turning in a nice performance) should have been trained on how to hold his weapon. Little things like this give a horror flick a much needed grounding in realism and enhance the film in every aspect. Homeboy could have followed basic procedure with the same outcome.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #f1c232;"><b>CRUCIAL RAD</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">Jen. Let's hang out. You sing to me. I sing to you. We can trade off playing songs and talking shit. We can revel in smartassery, hit a secluded beach at night, make a fire, have some laughs and be goofy. You can wear that tank top if you want. Doesn't matter. Either way, I'll be more captivated by the wit and substance of what you are actually saying then I am by your two friends there. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;"> -Signed, every dude who is not a douchebag-</span></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">Max. Good show mate. Cheers!</span></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">The cinematography is ace.</span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #f1c232;">SPLATTER FACTOR</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">Like a mummy drinking sand through a desert wind tunnel. Don't ask me, I just write this shit.</span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #f1c232;">THE KILLSHOT</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #ffe599;">A horror flick with training wheels. Thus, I give it a lower rating then the critical score. If you're a fan of the genre, you could never see this and you wouldn't be missing anything. It's a solid enough flick technically but uninspired. Reviewing a movie like this sucks because there isn't much to grasp onto. It's neither horrible nor great. It's just kind of there. Unless you have a crush on the lead actress. Then, go for it. Seriously, I still really want to see Lawrence knock it out of the park in a real horror film. She is a captivating person to watch on screen. All of the best are.</span> </div>
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Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-71648668619080752692013-02-23T15:34:00.002-05:002013-02-23T16:01:23.306-05:00Sinister<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Rated: <b><span style="color: red;">R</span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #990000;">DIRECTOR / WRITER:</span></b> Scott Derrickson<br />
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<b><span style="color: #990000;">STARRING:</span></b> Ethan Hawke, Juliet Rylance, Michael Hall D'Addario, Clare Foley<br />
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<i><b><span style="color: lime;">CRITICAL SCORE:</span></b></i> <b><span style="color: red;">8 / 10</span></b><br />
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<b><i><span style="color: lime;">BULLET POINTS:</span></i></b> <b><span style="color: red;">9 / 10</span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: red;">PLOT</span></b><br />
Ellison Oswalt, a once successful author of True-Crime novels, is desperate for one more hit. He moves his family into the home that is the investigative basis for his new book, a home where an entire family was murdered and a child remains missing. Ellison comes across a box of Super8 films in the attic that were not there before. The motherfuckin' spooky shenanigans ensue.<br />
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<span style="color: red;"><b>TRAILER TRASH</b></span><br />
This flick had a solid advert that caught my attention. I usually like trailers that give you a little less of the plot, but this one did it's job. I missed a lot of films in the theaters in 2012. This is one I had planned on screening because it hit around Halloween. Some other gnarly happs went down so unfortunately, I had to wait for Blu. Anticipation. Ethan Hawke was a good indicator to me that the acting and the rest of the cast were going to be on point. All of that jazz had me looking forward to this one moreso than most other horror flicks last year. So did I snuff this bitchin' flick out or did I set myself up to be boogie'd on?..<br />
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<a name='more'></a><b><span style="color: red;">LOCK & LOAD</span></b><br />
Wow. Who the fuck? What the hell? This film is from a major studio? Put down the cocaine because it's true. Or pick it up. I don't know?<br />
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So, I'll admit that when I'm amped to see a horror flick, I'm usually let down. I'll also preclude the factola that in the recent past a lot of American horror films severely lack creativity and quality, especially from the scanners in Hollywood. Sinister suffers no such issues. Sinister punched me right in the gulliver. The director, Derrickson, did The Exorcism of Emily Rose which was pretty boss but The Day The Earth Stood Still remake sucked a golf ball through a garden hose. Unless you're Uwe Boll though, I don't hold shit against anybody. Being in the industry, there are a lot of factors and people that contribute to the success or downfall of a flick. Sinister isn't perfect, but it pretty much nailed it.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0aSjTKv0q20/USkI6uYvVII/AAAAAAAAAdA/E8vTpkfniYg/s1600/SinisterStill2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0aSjTKv0q20/USkI6uYvVII/AAAAAAAAAdA/E8vTpkfniYg/s320/SinisterStill2.jpg" width="320" /></a>The acting is dead on all around. Great character actors in smaller roles, some new blood turning in good performances, particularly James Ransone as the Deputy (nice nuance & multi-dimensional character work) and Juliet Rylance as Ellison's wife Tracy (great dichotomy, feeling that pull your character feels) which leaves me to Ethan Hawke. Hawke turns in a great performance and I love seeing this dude keep knocking it out of the park. Drinks on me brohime!<br />
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Derrickson does a great job directing here as well as writing. Other writers are listed on this film so cheers to y'all. Loved the camera work and look of the film as well. Sinister operates wicked deadly on all fronts. It really builds some great tension and the use of the Super8 snuff films is fucking right on crucial. Sinister knows how to do suspense, build on it and deliver. Something that separates Sinister is it's use of the medium works on both a fantastical wavelength while staying grounded in a pretty 'real' vibe. The story and thematic elements play on each other like a neon bikini on a tan blonde bangin' surfer chick. That means it's righteous, in case you are a clueless dweeb. One of the best horror films of 2012, hands down. ExoSkeleton!<br />
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<b><span style="color: red;">PICKING BONES</span></b><br />
<span style="color: #f1c232;"><b><i>*Spoiler Alert Dickweeds*</i></b></span><br />
My biggest problem is showing the dead kids so much, so often and in such bright light. Really killed the vibe. Less is more. This aspect failed completely. I like that it's there, I just hate how it was done. Bring on the ambiguity, homes!<br />
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Same goes as above for Mr. Boogie, albeit less so. I dug the glimpses. I didn't dig seeing so much of him in the final act. Granted, what to show and what not to show of your juggernaut, and how often, is a wicked tough line to walk. I'm not being harsh, it's just that these two elements kept Sinister from a possible 10 / 10. So yeah hosers, I'm nitpicking. What the fuck is it you think I do here?<br />
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The Boogie Man angle pissed me off. Why? Because I'm in pre-production on my own short horror film, The Shape, about the boogie man. Totally different take. Fucking Sinister did it really well though. Challenge accepted. Alright, this isn't really a gripe. Go suck an egg.<br />
<span style="color: #f1c232;"><b><i>*Spoiler Alert Over*</i></b></span><br />
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<b><span style="color: red;">CRUCIAL RAD</span></b><br />
A Hollywood horror movie that is rated R that doesn't suck and exists for the grown ass folks and is ORIGINAL and not a remake. Did I just say that? Are there pills involved? Who fucking greenlit this? I'm sending you a mason jar of moonshine and two slaps in the fuckin' mouth because I like ya'!<br />
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This came out around Halloween. Combine that shit with what I stated above. Fucking Bizarro-World.<br />
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Cool take on the Boogs. Great story.<br />
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Acting. Thank you.<br />
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<b><span style="color: red;">SPLATTER FACTOR</span></b><br />
There is some disturbing shit in this flick. It's not particularly a juicy gorefest but Sinister does it's sinister bits really well. It leaves enough to the imagination and shows enough to make you cringe. I'll leave it at that so as not to ruin your experience. You're welcome dudettes and duders.<br />
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<span style="color: red;"><b>THE KILLSHOT</b></span><br />
Sinister takes itself seriously, is actually rated R, doesn't pull any bullshit punches, has a cool story, has a solid cast that delivers, a seriously spooky intense vibe and is an ORIGINAL horror film aimed at adults. Wow. Sad that the last point is such a big deal. Shocked this came out of a big budget American studio. Should I get my hopes up and go as far as to thinking this is a turning point? Probably not. So yeah, look, if you like horror movies, this is one of the best of 2012. Buy that shit, rent it, whatever. Throw your money at it because we need more of this and in Hollywood, money has the loudest voice. Job well done to Derrickson, cast and crew.<br />
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Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-60935519581496847222013-02-22T00:41:00.003-05:002013-02-22T12:30:01.788-05:00Mama<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Rated: <span style="color: red;">PG-13</span><br />
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<span style="color: orange;">DIRECTOR & STORY</span><br />
Andy Muschietti<br />
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Jessica Chastain, Nicolaj Coster-Waldau, Megan Charpentier, Isabelle Nelisse<br />
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<b><i><span style="color: orange;">CRITICAL SCORE:</span></i></b> <span style="color: lime;"><b>6 / 10</b></span> <b><i><span style="color: orange;">BULLET POINTS:</span></i></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">7.5 / 10</span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: red;">PLOT</span></b><br />
After horrific shenanigans leave them abandoned for 5 years in a cabin deep in the woods, two young girly chilluns are found and adopted by their uncle and his somewhat apathetic rocker girlfriend. How did the girls survive on their own?... or were they really alone? Mama said freak you out.<br />
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<span style="color: red;"><b>TRAILER TRASH</b></span><br />
Straight up, this trailer looked flat out gnurkin' & I was actually pumped for this one. Guillermo Del Toro's stamp was on the flick, which doesn't do anything for me either way. I dig his flicks but homeboy's stamp was on Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark which was (meh)diocre. Plus Del Toro kind of gets behind a certain type of "horror" film that is more dark fantasy than straight horror. So my stoked outlook was a bit tempered by that and the fact that Mama grabbed a PG-13 rating. Add in rocked out Chastain smoking up the screen and that sister-fucker we all love to hate, Jaime Lannister (Coster-Waldau who is awesome in Game of Thrones) and I was hopeful. So, did I throw Mama from the train or did she suck my soul out of my back?...<br />
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<a name='more'></a><b><span style="color: red;">LOCK & LOAD</span></b><br />
Once Upon A Time... It's how we kicked off this woodsy freak show and should have been a clue for me on what to expect. Mama is a long format version of a short film, so it starts strong but gets barrel rolled in the third act; a common problem when short films are expanded. It does recover somewhat though and there are some cool things about this film.<br />
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Mama is cinematographically beautiful. That said, I could have done without about 50% of the CGI. It pulls me out of a flick every time. I would have loved this movie if we actually saw Mama less and especially if Cousin It wasn't cruisin' around on the floor like a tweaked out spaniel. Less is more with the CG nearly every. single. time. The camera work was awesome though. Loved the colors, movement of shots, editing and composition. Mama has an oogey vibe going for it right out of the gate and doesn't drop the ball there either.<br />
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The pacing of the film is solid as well. The setup story was rad, so I was hip to the concept of what was going down Charlie Brown. Unfortunately, as we get further along there are some definite plot holes from a logical perspective. Without giving anything away, these holes could have been plugged up very simply, putting our characters in the same place in the final act in a way the audience could buy. It was annoying because it kind of fell apart and pulled me out at a crucial moment. That mung mess would be so easily averted, but alas, we have a fuckaroo right before the climax.<br />
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Acting. Acting y'all. It's what takes Mama to another level. Coster-Waldau does a solid job being the awesome Uncle we are rooting for. Dig this dude. Now let's talk Chastain. As an actor, I'm straight up sprung for the undeniable talent of Jessica Chastain. The way she built her character and executed the journey of Annabel is beyond awesome. A master class on how to do it right. A hipster rock chick so easily could have been boffo and completely campy but not once do you not buy into Annabelle and her journey. She is that fucking good. Which brings me to the little girls playing the sisters Victoria (Megan Charpentier) and Lilly (Isabelle Nelisse). They were both incredibly good and beyond that. Seriously, I was blown away especially by Megan, who along with Chastain, does much more than hold the film together. Megan brings it to another level and probably has the most screen time. This little actress along with Isabelle was the heart of the film. Bottom line: the main cast makes this film what it is.<br />
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<b><span style="color: red;">PICKING BONES</span></b><br />
Mama kind of didn't do it for me as a horror film. However, when I switched my perspective into Pan's Labyrinth mode about halfway through, I enjoyed it much more. Alright Del Toro, this is the second time. I'm clued in, brah. I'm not going to say it was false advertising. I'm going to strike it up to me being a fucking freak and watching way too many straight up horror films. This is more of a dark fantasy with a horror backsplash. Go into it like that, you'll probably enjoy it more. Looking forward to watching it the second time around.<br />
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CGI. Again, maybe okay for a fantasy but for a horror film, fuck off with the motherfuckin' CGI. For serious. Mama is scarier when we get glimpses. The CGI isn't bad itself, but it is overused.<br />
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Contortion. I guess I understand why, but it was too showy and, again, overused.<br />
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Plot holes. I fell into one so deep, it tried to grab my dick. <br />
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<b><span style="color: red;">CRUCIAL RAD</span></b><br />
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-M_qGf0PBOR4/USbpLEZy2eI/AAAAAAAAAcA/zl-iv9xZ0hg/s1600/Mama+Chastain.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="247" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-M_qGf0PBOR4/USbpLEZy2eI/AAAAAAAAAcA/zl-iv9xZ0hg/s320/Mama+Chastain.jpg" width="320" /></a>Hallway scare. Peed a little. Fucker's quick.<br />
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The cabin kill. Peed a little more.<br />
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Story and concept are right on icy. Lick it up.<br />
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The cast could not have been better. Chastain is up there teaching a master class and these two kids are right on the level. Special mention to actor Daniel Kash for his turn as Dr. Dreyfuss. Nice work dude.<br />
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Jessica Chastain's cleavage. What?!<br />
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<span style="color: red;"><b>SPLATTER FACTOR</b></span><br />
Nope. I splattered some water on my lap once when my bottom lip forgot how to act when partaking of a bottled beverage.<br />
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<b><span style="color: red;">THE KILLSHOT</span></b><br />
Mama works well as a dark fantasy film and not so well as a hardcore horror film. This should be evident from the beginning when we kick off with, "Once Upon A Time". Again, this film is an expansion on a short film and it does suffer from plot issues that could have been rather easily avoided. Not digging the CGI. It's not done horribly, it's just overused. In most cases I find the less we see of our antagonist, the better. The more that is inferred, the better. Mama recovers itself because it has a killer cast and a creeped out vibe that is sufficiently gnarly. Chastain is pretty sexy all tatted up; our angel with broken wings. Maybe I'm just into bad girls. (I am.) Seriously, she is a badass actor and lights up the screen along with Megan Charpentier. The story concept is choice. Definitely a strong point. Overall, righteous little flick from a first time director based on his own story. Mad respect & congratulations. I look forward to seeing what's next.<br />
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Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-81938573443439191602013-02-21T22:02:00.001-05:002013-02-21T22:21:23.052-05:00Enhanced & ReWolfed<span style="color: #f1c232; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I'm champing at the bit.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #f1c232; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-InFehoS2LVA/USbgm8tgXhI/AAAAAAAAAbs/aD9I_s886lI/s1600/Werewolf01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-InFehoS2LVA/USbgm8tgXhI/AAAAAAAAAbs/aD9I_s886lI/s400/Werewolf01.jpg" width="250" /></a>So, here's the lowdown on what's coming up for my filmy rant-space. I am refocusing this blog to the Horror, Science Fiction, Fantasy & Cult genres. I'll also be branching out beyond just reviews and posting articles, lists, blurbs, passive aggressive prattle & pictures that will steam your eyeballs into hard boiled ocular eggs. Just peel and look again with newly nude orbs. Ch,Ch,Ch, Change.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #f1c232; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Not fershure how all this is going to add up to a coherent space but I'm here to chew bubble gum and kick ass. And quote flicks. Coherency is massively overrated. Expect more totally ace posts, eye-twitch inducing twists on your favorite cuss words, more slang from the 80's than you can throw your checkered Van's at, poetic license flexed hard on this brogue we call English and my take on things past, present and future in the best genres of celluloid and digibits. The full moon is less than a few nights away, so I better get started before full shapeshift. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #f1c232; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">My canines are itching.</span></div>
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<b><i>~ Later Days & Better Lays ~</i></b>Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-23679112028419374762012-11-07T22:24:00.000-05:002013-02-21T20:52:55.410-05:005 From 31Okay, one last blog to squeeze out of my 2nd Annual 31 NIGHTS OF HORROR marathon. Here, I'm going to attempt to recommend just a few films from the pumpkin patch. No spoilers or rotten Jacks. Grab your butcher knife. Let's get carving.<br />
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<span style="color: orange;"><b style="color: red;">THE DEVIL'S ROCK</b> <b style="color: cyan;">8/10</b></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;">(2011 - New Zealand - Director: Paul Campion)</span><b style="color: #b45f06;"></b><br />
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This one gets my award for the unexpected surprise of the marathon. This film was the equivalent of that Snickers bar you find at the bottom of the left over remnants of your Trick R' Treat bag. It is a well done period film that takes place on the Channel Islands on D-Day. It concerns two soldiers who are on a mission to distract
from the Normandy invasion and stumble upon a Nazi plan that has to do
with the occult, demonology and the supernatural. Hi-Jinks ensue. There is somewhat of a slow burn pacing, which I generally enjoy, some great special effects, splatter and the acting is solid. Director Paul Campion does a great job building enough suspense to cut with a knife. Craig Hall, Matthew Sunderland and Gina Varela all turn in great performances. These are the indies I love the most, the unexpected gems. Kudos to cast and crew.</div>
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<b>THE CRAFT <span style="color: cyan;">8/10</span></b><br />
<span style="color: #ffd966;">(1996 - USA - Director: Andrew Fleming)</span><br />
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My choice to include The Craft in this list is in large part due to me not remembering thinking much of it back in the 96' when I first watched it. The Craft put the ruler to my ass and knuckles for my dissidence this time around and, yes, I enjoyed it. The film centers around a teenage trio of Catholic Prep School girls who are down with witchcraft. If that isn't fucking hot, what is? The flick is wonderfully 90's and many of us who were teens during that decade can definitely feel the nostalgia here. The plot setup isn't breaking any new ground but it doesn't have to because the film is extremely effective and does include it's share of unexpected moments. The direction, script and awesome cast really makes this film what it is. Neve Campbell, Rachel True, Skeet Ulrich and Breckin Meyer are great here, however Fairuza Balk is top notch and really raises the bar with her incredibly dynamic performance while Robin Tunney does an awesome job at anchoring the film. I don't know how you pull off being alluringly sexy and run away creepy at the same time, but Fairuza did it. That said, I wish Fairuza Balk was involved in some higher profile projects because she is a stunningly good actress. Anyfuck, grab your black eyeliner, choker, some grunge CD's, ratty jeans, a flannel and a Pepsi Blue and revisit this one if it's been awhile. It might surprise you.</div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-6YQ_mXnSWGc/UJsiLt4R--I/AAAAAAAAAZU/62sYMoNYcXc/s1600/house_by_the_cemetery.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-6YQ_mXnSWGc/UJsiLt4R--I/AAAAAAAAAZU/62sYMoNYcXc/s320/house_by_the_cemetery.jpg" width="209" /></a><b><span style="color: #cc0000;">THE HOUSE BY THE CEMETERY</span> <span style="color: cyan;">9/10</span></b><br />
(1981 - Italy - Director: Lucio Fulci)<br />
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There's really not much for me to say here. This is a personal favorite of mine and possibly Fulci's best film besides the seminal Zombi. The House By The Cemetery first came to my attention about a decade ago when I was really getting into Giallos and Italian horror, which are now consequently some of my all time favorite sub-genres. I love the fantasy elements, surreality, creepy mood and tone, as well as, all out splatter of Italian horror films and The House By The Cemetery displays these elements in spades. It has classic traits of a haunted house flick, a slasher, a ghost story, a mystery and an awesome dose of splatter along with a "what the fuck is happening?" quality. I love the mood of this film and greatly admire the techniques used. If you haven't seen this one, strap in for a nutty fuckin' ride friends. This movie is a classic in my book. </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8t9t4AxidUo/UJsiUT1ViKI/AAAAAAAAAZc/3z3ZEak_WQU/s1600/tourist_trap_poster_01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8t9t4AxidUo/UJsiUT1ViKI/AAAAAAAAAZc/3z3ZEak_WQU/s320/tourist_trap_poster_01.jpg" width="214" /></a><b><span style="color: #3d85c6;">TOURIST TRAP</span> <span style="color: cyan;">9/10</span></b><br />
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(1979 - USA - Director: David Schmoeller)</div>
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Alright, I'm not saying shit about the plot on this. It's a 70's horror film starring Chuck Connors, a deliciously young Tanya Roberts and a bunch of actors most of us have never heard of or from again. I can honestly tell you that this film has an amazing sense of dread and creep factor. I don't get the fuckin' willies very often, but when I watched this about 7 or 8 years ago I actually paused it at one point and said out loud, "Holy Shit". I would say that even in horror circles, this one is massively gigantically enormously underrated. I absolutely love this film. I do believe this is one that ooged out Stephen King and became a favorite of his as well. Hunt it down and watch it. If you like horror movies at all, this one will not disappoint. I'd also like to note that there was a certain remake from a few years back that I found to be done incredibly well and titled itself as a remake of a different film. However, in truth this remake was way more like Tourist Trap. Any ideas what remake I'm talking about? </div>
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<b><span style="color: red;">SUSPIRIA</span> <span style="color: cyan;">10/10</span></b><br />
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(1977 - Italy - Director: Dario Argento)</div>
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I'm going to put it simply. One of the best films of all time, any genre. A pinnacle of horror. Probably my second favorite movie, ever. This is a masterpiece on every level. Like I stated in my previous posting, this film bends reality, is stunningly gorgeous and operates on a level that is akin to fantasy. The plot has to do with witches and there are actually two thematic sequels to Suspira but that's all I'm going to say about storyline. This film stands on it's own right next to any of the greats. One of the most influential stunningly artistic and disturbing horror
films of all time. The colors, the direction, the music, the acting,
the sets... masterpiece. So many great directors from all genres admire and discuss Suspiria for very good reason. If you haven't seen it, no
matter your taste in films, it should be on your must watch list.</div>
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It's been badass fun to share some of my incoherent rambling lunatic murmurings on my second annual 31 Nights of Horror marathon with you. I've created a new tradition for myself and though I watch horror movies all year long, it's just different when Autumn hits and Halloween is in the air. I am already anticipating the 2013 list and though I don't pre-plan all of the films on the list, I certainly have a couple of flicks picked out especially for 2013 already. Feel free to share any thoughts or make suggestions for next year in the comment section below. Thanks for reading and bleeding.<br />
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<br />Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-7918457375841398382012-11-05T05:38:00.000-05:002013-10-30T03:47:24.235-04:0031 Nights of Horror - PART 3: The Final Battle<span style="color: orange;">Sluts, I'm fresh off of a FRINGE: Season 3 marathon (I'm late to the ballgame on this show but I fuckin' love it and I'm 1/3 through Season 3) and I'm back to finish off this trilogy of reviews. My God, someone give me a medal because I know I'm the best at least entertaining myself. For fucks sake, look at that previous sentence. Who reads this shit anyway?</span> <br />
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October 22nd - <b style="color: red;">MOON OF THE WOLF</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">5/10</span></b><br />
This 1972 ABC Movie of the Week is good... for a made for TV movie from 1972. Obviously, there's not much in the way of gore or fright factor. I like the straight ahead honesty of this little flick and some of the performances are actually quite good. For that, along with a pretty decent wolfman, this one earned a quiet nod and a smile. I'd shake it's hand and buy it a whiskey but I wouldn't take it home to bed. Entertaining for what it is, it was a nice segue between the previous film and the next.<br />
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October 23rd - <b style="color: red;">THE CRAFT</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">8/10</span></b><br />
First off, I didn't realize the first time around how Fairuza Balk is ridiculously talented and her performance in this film is fucking amazing. The whole cast really nails it here but she stands out. I honestly did not remember this film being this entertaining or solid. It sort of took me unaware because I haven't seen it in years and it not only holds up really well for a 90's flick but was much better this time around. The whole vibe of the film is just so 90's dope, anyone who was a teen during that time can't help but dig on this. It's also cool, now that I'm living in L.A. to notice all off the places this was shot. I highly encourage you to revisit this one if it's been a while. Lastly, there is something so enigmatically sexy and appealing about Fairuza's damaged, off the reservation, character and performance, I've had a crush on her since I was teen. Crush renewed.<br />
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October 24rth - <b><span style="color: red;">THE LOST BOYS</span></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">10/10</span></b><br />
I make no apologies. I am in no way ashamed of the constant references I get to looking like a young Kiefer Sutherland from Lost Boys or Stand By Me. Happens all of the time. I don't understand it, but fuck it. It's a nice break from the Thor and Jax Teller references. Bottom line is this film is a fucking 80's classic. If you don't think so, I will tear your gorramned lymphatic system straight the fuck out and use your heart for a fucking coin purse. You've got the 2 Coreys, you've got a young Jason Patric Solarbabying the shit outta this film, you've got an amazing script, cast and performances, you've got gore, you've got the appearance of PeanutButterBoppers in gramps candy spot, Billy Wirth straight getting the death by stereo, fucking Bill S. Preston Esquire mulleting your oculars like a fucking champion and you've got KIEFER FUCKING SUTHERLAND making this film his little backyard whore and I don't even know what that means. Fucking classic. Son of a bitch, someone go get me my parachute pants, my baby blue GT Pro Performer, a boombox loaded with some 80's metal and new wave, a line of cocaine, a paint splattered lime green shirt and get your bodadical radacious ass out of my fucking way because I'm already sporting some Roos, got the retro sideswept River Phoenix hair and drive an 87 Fiero GT and giveth no fucks. Where am I? What am I talking about? Brah's and Brahnettes, I'm nurkin' and you can go suck an egg if you aren't feelin' this film. Fucking Lost. Fucking. Boys. <br />
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October 25th - <b style="color: red;">1408</b> <b style="color: lime;">7/10</b><br />
John Cusack could make a Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich on camera and somehow be completely entertaining, affable and make me want to take him out for a beer and shoot the shit. Just be my friend John Cusack. I give props to this film for Sam Jackson's performance here as well. Really makes an impact with such little screen time. Straight up kudos to myself for living in a fucking hotel (no comment) and watching this. Made it that much more disturbing. Stephen King, you twisted badass, thank you for the story. Solid film.<br />
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October 26th - <b><span style="color: red;">GHOST SHIP</span></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">5/10</span></b><br />
Alright, this film straight ripped the poster art straight the fuck off of the eerily moody and still out of print 1980 flick Death Ship. Only fucking Hollywood ends a fucking ghost story with such pomp and explosions. Ahh, maybe I need to give it a 3rd go in case I need to listen to some Mudvayne and am more prepared for what I think is more action that horror. I almost need to give this film an extra point for Karl Urban's American accent. It's more American than mine and I'm from Texas.<br />
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October 27th - <b style="color: red;">DEADLY BLESSING</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">7/10</span></b><br />
Hello young Sharon Stone who shows up in the 2nd act. You are 1981 HottieHot. Wes Craven makes a flick about Devil worship in Amish country. They weren't Amish... something else stricter than that I guess. I don't know. Religiousy Religion stuff that is oogy. Deadly Blessing has a somewhat palpable sense of dread, some solid acting, a satisfying last act and I didn't really know where things were going. All of that is good. Started off a little stiff and dry (that's what she said) but got better. This would be a good double feature with Children of the Corn. Similar vibe.<br />
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October 28th - <b style="color: red;">SUSPIRIA</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">10/10</span></b><br />
Suspiria is an absolutely seminal, genre shattering, 1977 Italian horror film from master director Dario Argento that is, and will continue to be, one of the most influential stunningly artistic and disturbing horror films of all time. The colors, the direction, the music, the acting, the sets... masterpiece. So many great directors from all genres know this film well for a very good reason. If you haven't seen it, no matter your taste in films, it should be on your must watch list. I envy you because I wish I could watch it for the first time every time. The reality bending fantasy terror concerns a ballet school in Germany, a centuries old coven of witches led by Mater Suspiriorum, The Mother of Sighs, one of three witches that will bring about the end of times on a world wide scale through their black magic. One of my absolute favorite films of all time. A pinnacle of the genre and of all films. Period. End of story.<br />
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October 29th - <b style="color: red;">INFERNO</b> <b style="color: lime;">9/10</b><br />
Not nearly as critically loved as Suspiria, this 1980 film carries the theme of the the Three Mothers to New York, where the cruelest of the trio, Mater Tenebrarum (The Mother of Darkness), resides. Even less straight forward in plot structure than Suspiria, this film is still considered by many to be a masterpiece of surreal supernatural terror and probably still makes the top 25 list for me of best horror films ever made. Death personified. Love the artistic flare of this one and the mood of this film and much like Suspiria, cannot be matched. Keith Emerson of Emerson, Lake and Palmer lends a top notch thundering soundtrack of creep to this.<br />
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October 30th - <b><span style="color: red;">MOTHER OF TEARS </span></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">7/10</span></b><br />
The final entry in the Three Mothers trilogy, this brutal 2007 entry wraps things up with Mater Lachrymarum, The Third Mother known as The Mother of Tears. Argento directs his sexy daughter, Asia Argento, in the lead role. Less colorful, more straightforward, the tone of this film differs vastly from the previous films in the trilogy and has a blunt edge; a rawness and harsh brutality that takes the place of the fantasy feel of the other films. This is an incredibly solid movie but some of that intangible magic is missing here. All the same, I enjoy a great many things about the final film but it always leaves me wanting more... still highly recommended.<br />
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October 31st - <span style="color: orange;">Double Feature - </span><b style="color: red;">HALLOWEEN 4: THE RETURN OF MICHAEL MYERS</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">8/10</span></b><br />
The return of the boogieman to the formula that the original Halloween film redefined, which in turn invented a genre. An incredibly fun slasher film with my favorite personification of pure evil. Amazing performance by Danielle Harris as well. Love this one. Biggest bone to pick though was them using the cheap Don Post mask that just can't duplicate the original. Hate it. The original mask is so far superior. All of the Halloween films have a special place on my shelves but... this is the last really good Halloween film until, in my opinion, H20.<br />
<b><span style="color: red;">HALLOWEEN 5: THE REVENGE OF MICHAEL MYERS</span></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">6/10</span></b><br />
The one that began the fucking Druid mythology, man in black, dumbass storyline that infected the franchise. This one was the beginning of the end for the Halloween sequels. Though it certainly still has it's moments, a lot of the general ambiance from the previous Michael Myers films is lost in this one. Danielle Harris turns in another awesome performance, there are definitely some good scares, the mask is much better here (though still not as good as the original). This is the one that spelled doom for the franchise. I still love it nonetheless because it, at the very least, it doesn't completely lose coherency, has some memorable scares and does not star a fucking rapper. Whatever... easily still my favorite horror film franchise and there is no other icon of horror that will ever be the personification of evil or the boogieman like Michael Myers.<br />
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<span style="color: orange;">Well, that's it for the 2012 31 Nights of Horror marathon. Can't wait until next year to do it all over again with a new batch of horrifying, and not so horrifying, flicks. Don't know when I'll post again or much else. Hopefully before next year starts. Leave a comment if inclined. I love to hear other peoples thoughts on my favorite genre of movies. Otherwise piss off and have a wonderful day or fantastic night or whatever the fuck time period you're dealing with in your version of reality. Roll credits.</span>Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-16981981081398617272012-11-02T22:22:00.000-04:002012-11-02T22:22:49.734-04:0031 Nights of Horror 2012 - PART 2I'm always varying things up when doing these marathons, whether it's different eras or sub-genres. I always throw stuff in I haven't seen and there were actually a couple of surprises in this group.<br />
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October 11th - <b style="color: red;">ROAD TRAIN</b> (US TITLE - ROAD KILL) <b><span style="color: lime;">6/10</span></b><br />
This is an Aussie flick from 2010 about a demonic Road Train, which is basically an 18-Wheeler with extra trailer, that traverses the outback hunting people. I am a sucker for killer vehicle movies and I've been a fan of nearly every cult Aussie flick since I was a kid. With all of that going for it, this film was a bit of a letdown. Without giving anything away, the film actually has a solid concept. They just spend way too much time on a plot that would be better suited for a soap. The pacing needed work, the dialogue was shit so the actors couldn't overcome the script and some of the artistic flare just didn't work. However, this flick shows promise and tried to be a little different and surreal. For that I gave it an extra point.<br />
<br />October 12th - <b style="color: red;">SCARECROWS</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">7/10</span></b><br />
HayAy!! There just aren't many decent killer Scarecrow movies out there and really no great ones. Another opportunity for someone to do something badass, I say. Anyfuck, this 1988 film is easily one of the better ones and some might argue the best. It sets a great tone and does it's best to overcome its many faults. Bottom line though is that its an entertaining flick with a better than average plot.<br />
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October 13th - <b style="color: red;">THE DEVIL'S ROCK</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">8/10</span></b><br />
This one might be the surprise of the month. I wasn't really expecting much to be honest and this film delivered the demonic goods. From 2011, the storyline actually takes place on the eve of D-Day, so it's a period piece and it's done well. Interesting plot focusing on 2 soldiers who are on a mission to distract from the Normandy invasion and stumble upon a Nazi plan that has to do with the occult and the supernatural. I highly recommend this one so I'll say no more concerning the story. Great pacing, a slow burn, goopy gore galore, incredibly solid acting and go ahead and Netfix this whore because it's streaming for your pleasure.<br />
<br />October 14th - <b><span style="color: red;">ELVIRA: MISTRESS OF THE DARK</span></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">5/10</span></b><br />
Looking to lighten the mood, I decided it was about time I watched this film. Anyone who is a horror geek is familiar with the bodacious boded Elvira as a host of some of the best horror and science fiction schlock flicks around. Elvira may be stacked but the jokes in this were flat. Her brand of humor is great in small doses but can't carry a film. Also, there are little to no horror elements. This is really a full on comedy and a pretty generic one at best.<br />
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October 15th -<span style="color: orange;"> Double Feature - </span><b><span style="color: red;">DOLLY DEAREST</span></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">5/10</span></b><br />
I laughed, I cried (when I accidentally rubbed salsa in my eye), I watched Tasha Yar try and save her brat daughter, I saw a child that could have easily grown up to be Rick Moranis be a smartass turd to Rip Torn and I watched an older than the Mayans spirit possess some dolls that shook like they were having seizures when they screamed. <br />
<b><span style="color: red;">DOLLS</span></b> <b style="color: lime;">8/10</b><br />
This is a little nugget of awesome directed by Stuart Gordon. That should tell you enough right there. Love the mood of this film. Gordon has a great sense of dark fantasy in his films, much like Argento, where you feel that you're in a world where all the rules don't quite apply. If you haven't seen it, I can almost guarantee you'll be hooked after the teddy bear incident. Enjoy.<br />
<br />October 16th - <b style="color: red;">THE HAUNTING OF JULIA</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">4/10</span></b><br />
Although from 1977, this one was new to me. All I can tell you is that it's clear Mia Farrow is bad for children. This much is crystal. Probably the funniest of all children death scenes right off the bat that will leave you shaking your head in the disbelief of the utter retardation you have just witnessed. From there it is a boring look at a dry self-possessed nutbar who does a bunch of shit that makes no sense. This film is a yawn and a disappointment.<br />
<br />October 17th - <b><span style="color: red;">CHILDREN OF THE CORN</span></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">7/10</span></b><br />
The film that made cornfields creepy. You've seen it. You've heard the theme music. You've become acquainted with He who walks behind the rows. He's made of animation. <br />
<br />October 18th - <b style="color: red;">DON'T LOOK NOW</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">2/10</span></b><br />
Don't Look Now. Do not. Look. At the screen. Holy shit, I can't believe this was recommended to me so highly as some kind of classic. The only thing more disturbing then the awkward weird grunts Donald Sutherland makes through this film is the love scene between him and Julie Christie where I swear she was up in his armpit nuzzling ferociously. I'll quote a review of this I read after viewing it and trying to understand what people enjoy about this flick. "God save us from the artist." This film wants to be a giallo so bad but the talent is NOT there. And by the way, the ending that every one says scarred them for life would be a fucking hors d'oeuvre in an Argento film. Go watch Deep Red or Tenebre and see how shit is done. And oh yes film friends, I understand very well the intended symbolism, etc, etc but I also understand that half of the shit you claim to be symbolism is in fact random nothing shots that dissolve into objects. This movie sucks. I'd never been so happy for a movie to end. Tripe.<br /><br />
October 19th - <b style="color: red;">TOURIST TRAP</b> <b style="color: lime;">9/10</b><br style="color: lime;" />This 1979 piece of uneasiness is such an underrated rarely seen film. One of my all time favorite horror films, this flick is flat out disturbing. The first time I watched this about 8 or 9 years ago I couldn't believe how effective this film is in creep factor. The less said the better but if I could only recommend 2 rare films from this year's marathon, this would be one of them. I would also be remiss to not tell you... young Tanya Roberts.<br />
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October 20th - <b style="color: red;">PHANTASM</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">10/10</span></b><br />
Listen, if you're not familiar with surreality that is 1979's Phantasm, you aren't familiar with a classic of the horror genre. If someone mentions "the tall man" or "the ball" and you're clueless, I recommend you rectify that shit immediately BOY.<br />
<br />October 21st - <b style="color: red;">HOUSE OF WAX (1953)</b> <b><span style="color: lime;"> 9/10</span></b><br />
An absolutely gorgeous piece of cinematic history that is still stunningly colorful. A Vincent Price classic that holds up amazingly well. Can't believe I waited this long to watch this.<br />
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<br />Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-43812367611982093602012-11-02T03:59:00.002-04:002012-11-02T03:59:58.984-04:0031 Nights of Horror 2012 - PART 1Yeah, I haven't posted a review of anything since August 2010. What did I do in 2011 and most of 2012? Moved to L.A. Got my ass whipped by life. I am sure all 3 of you who read this have been aching in your loins for some SilverBulletCinema blog action. So, I'm going to review my 2nd Annual horror film marathon, just touching on the pink parts. I'm also including my rating of the film next to the title, in case you're color blind. Here we go...<br />
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October 1st - <b><span style="color: red;">SESSION 9</span></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">8/10</span></b><br />
It surprises me how many people aren't familiar with this film. It's a creepy as hell slow burn shot in an abandoned asylum that is actually haunted. Session 9 has atmosphere to spare and an ending I will only refer to as murky. Fucking bad fucking ass. The acting is top notch. And, yes, as a matter of fact that one dude right there is Josh Lucas. You're welcome.<br />
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October 2nd - <b style="color: red;">BLACK SABBATH</b> <b style="color: lime;">6/10</b><br />
It's Italian. It's from 1963. Ozzy and company named their band after it. I prefer the first of the two films "The Telephone". Love the look of this film too. Based on the first 3 sentences I stated, you should watch it.<br />
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October 3rd - <span style="color: orange;">Double Feature - </span><b style="color: red;">THE VIDEO DEAD</b> <b style="color: lime;">5/10</b><br />
This flick from the 80's looks like it was shot on a camcorder with the neighbors kids as the leads. Disturbingly, I was entertained nonetheless. This fucking atrocity of cheesetasticness will retro rape your eyes.<br />
<b style="color: red;">THE GATE</b> <b style="color: lime;">7/10</b><br />
Hello little Craig Sheffer. I've loved this movie since I watched it at a slumber party when I was a hairless preteen. If you haven't seen it, then what the fuck? It has stop motion animation bitches.<br />
<br />October 4rth - <b style="color: red;">THE BURNING</b> <b style="color: lime;">7/10</b><br />The Jewish Friday the 13th. George Costanza gets murdered at summer camp. Oh, I gave away a plot point. What an arsehole. Fun movie. Saw this for the first time a few years ago. Nice gore, typical F13 rip off plot but easily one of the better ones.<br />
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October 5th - <b style="color: red;">SLITHER</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">9/10</span></b><br />
I know you've seen this. If not, I'd tell you to just go kill yourself but then I wouldn't want you to die without witnessing the perfect storm of B-Horror on the A-Level. If you haven't seen this, I'm telling Nathan Fillion on his twitter and he will tweet your failure to millions. <br />
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October 6th - <b style="color: red;">THE FACULTY</b> <b style="color: lime;">7/10</b><br />
Robert Rodriguez and a shitload of talented young actors make a Drive-In worthy Sci/Fi-Horror rip of Invasion of the Body Snatchers. Holy shit, he totally called the energy-drink fad. Just imagine what a FourLoco would do to one of those aliens.<br />
<br />October 7th - <b style="color: red;">THE HOUSE BY THE CEMETERY</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">10/10</span></b><br />
Italian masterpiece. One of my personal favorites. One of Fulci's absolute best. The pacing, the shots, the atmosphere, the gore, elements of the supernatural as well as a nice nod to Frankenstein. What more do you need?<br />
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October 8th - <span style="color: orange;">Double Feature - </span><b style="color: red;">CHILD'S PLAY</b> <b><span style="color: lime;">8/10</span></b><br />
Chucky. That's my review. You've seen it.<br />
<b><span style="color: red;">SEED OF CHUCKY</span></b> <b style="color: lime;">4/10</b><br />
These have steadily gotten worse and gone into straight bullshit camp. I mildly liked the Jennifer Tilly plot but it has a fucking rapper in it. Redman. Who plays himself. Who is referred to a couple of times as what sounds like "Redmin". My guess is that this is an attempt to make it sound less fucking ridiculous to call some one "Red Man" in normal conversation. This was my first time seeing this and it was everything I thought it would be. I'm actually looking forward to the reboot. That's fucked up.<br /><br />
October 9th - <b><span style="color: red;">WEREWOLF: THE BEAST AMONG US</span></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">6/10</span></b><br />
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I don't know, there might be a plot point in the title y'all. Fuck me with a turnip. Meh. The werewolf looked cool. It's entertaining if you are a werewolf fan. I still think the werewolf genre has not had it's night in the full moon, to silver coin a phrase. I just threw up in my mouth proofreading that last sentence. Seriously though, I really would love to see an amazing werewolf movie in the next few years. I happen to be writing one and have ideas for another. Tangent. I gave this one extra point for actually having a werewolf in the film instead of a giant wolf. Yes, there is a fucking difference.<br />
<br />October 10th - <b><span style="color: red;">BURN WITCH BURN</span></b> <b><span style="color: lime;">8/10</span></b><br />
Honestly, I have a hard time enjoying a lot of older horror films lately. Maybe it's the rehashing of the same plots I've seen incessantly in newer films that ruins the old ones for me upon retroactively viewing. Well, I have no such trouble with this film. Masterfully acted and directed, this gem from 1962 still shines in all of it's black and white glory. Originally titled Night of the Eagle (you'll understand after you see it), I really dug the storyline from start to finish. Highly recommend this and if Hollywood wants to remake everything in horror, I submit that this one would be amazing with the right director.<br />
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<br /><b style="color: yellow;">Okay, I'm sick of writing tonight. I'm going to watch something. Here is the list of the rest of the films that will be included in the next 2 parts to this review. There were some real surprises for me and I can't wait to get to them. </b><br />
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ROAD TRAIN (US TITLE - ROAD KILL)<br />SCARECROWS<br />THE DEVIL'S ROCK<br />ELVIRA: MISTRESS OF THE DARK<br /><span style="color: orange;">Double Feature - </span>DOLLY DEAREST & DOLLS<br />THE HAUNTING OF JULIA<br />CHILDREN OF THE CORN<br />DON'T LOOK NOW<br />TOURIST TRAP<br />PHANTASM<br />HOUSE OF WAX (1953)<br />MOON OF THE WOLF<br />THE CRAFT<br />THE LOST BOYS<br />1408<br />GHOST SHIP<br />DEADLY BLESSING<br />SUSPIRIA<br />INFERNO<br />MOTHER OF TEARS<br /><span style="color: orange;">Double Feature - </span>HALLOWEEN 4 & HALLOWEEN 5 <br />
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<br /><br />Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-44067223146962296252010-08-24T13:39:00.004-04:002011-03-16T20:00:10.546-04:00SCOTT PILGRIM VS THE WORLD<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/THIXVnhvU1I/AAAAAAAAAJ4/VROyFI6ck6Q/s1600/ScottPilgrim2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/THIXVnhvU1I/AAAAAAAAAJ4/VROyFI6ck6Q/s320/ScottPilgrim2.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Rated <span style="color: red;">PG-13</span><br />
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<span style="color: lime;">DIRECTOR:</span> Edgar Wright<br />
<span style="color: lime;">STARRING:</span> Michael Cera, Mary Elizabeth Winstead<br />
<span style="color: lime;">WRITTEN BY:</span> Edgar Wright, Michael Bacall<br />
(Based on the graphic novel by: Bryan Lee O'Malley)<br />
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<i style="color: lime;"><b>CRITICAL SCORE:</b></i> <b style="color: red;">9 </b>/ 10<br />
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<i style="color: lime;"><b>BULLET POINTS:</b></i> <span style="color: red;"><b>10</b></span> / 10<br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>PLOT</b></div>Scott Pilgrim must defeat his new girlfriend's 7 evil exes to win her heart.<br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>TRAILER TRASH</b></div>Right out of the bag, I thought this shit looked crazy cool inventive and pretty different from the normal fair. Plus, after just checking out another recent and super cool Cera flick, <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>YOUTH IN REVOLT</b></i>, I was pretty pumped to see <i><b><span style="color: #45818e;">SCOTT PILGRIM VS THE WORLD</span></b></i>. So, was this thing a shallow effects-driven mess or was <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>SPVTW</b></i> actually an 'epic of epic epicness'?.. (The rhyming of the previous sentence is unintentional and upon further review, goofier than a wooden watch. Therefore, I leave it for your viewing pleasure.)<br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>LOCK AND LOAD</b></div>There truly isn't another movie I have ever seen that is like <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>SPVTW</b></i> and I say that in a completely complimentary way. This film moves at the speed of thought (sometimes faster) and maintains a breakneck pace that kept me hyped up like I defeated 7 Dr. Peppers and a garbage bag full of Pop Rocks. That is not to say that this film is vapid or shallow in the least. <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>SPVTW</b></i> is extremely clever and incorporates elements of comic books, video games, music and even other films, bringing these other mediums to life in front of you in an inspired and fresh way. The director, Wright, said he wanted to, "embrace all of those flourishes of the video games" and "employ those techniques and aesthetics like the onomatopoeic sound effects". Wright succeeds abundantly in this while giving us a visually outrageous cluster bob-omb of rad effects, insane characters, fight sequences and action sequences that blister the screen in a way that contributes rather than detracts from the narrative. BTW, I looked up the fucking word "onomatopoeic" and it just basically means words like "Bang" and "Zap" and "Boom" that are formed from the way they sound. Look at that shit, you learned something. Or, if you didn't and you already knew the meaning to "onomatopoeic", then here's a piece of candy, smartass. Whoosh! I just took that delicious candy back out of your grasp and ate it. Yum.<br />
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As an actor, Michael Cera has his advocates and detractors. I'm neither. I like him in some films and in others I don't. In <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>SPVTW</b></i>, he is brilliant and absolutely perfectly cast. As a matter of fact, I love the cast of this film. They are an eclectic bunch of talent that bring these characters to life. Winstead is yummy as Ramona Flowers, taking a character that could have very easily been unlikable and making her quirky, hip, flawed and altogether cool; someone you can see Scott Pilgrim fighting for.<br />
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The way this film is shot could be a blog unto itself. <i><b><span style="color: #45818e;">SPVTW</span></b></i> is a slice of cinematic art and every department should be congratulated. If this film isn't nominated for an Oscar in the editing category, I will need to punch some old bitches in the breakfast. Wright is the puppet-master and with a tug of his lunatic strings, the sound effects and visual effects work in tangent with the cinematography and dance a tripped out ballet of awesome-sauce. That isn't to say that <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>SPVTW </b></i>is perfect... but it's close.<br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>PICKING BONES</b></div>One of my only complaints is that this flick runs a bit long. I am not one to give a shit how long a movie actually is, but <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>SPVTW</b></i> feels too long and that's a problem; especially given the frenetic pace at which this film moves. <br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>BREAKING BONES</b></div>The colossal amount of sound and visual references in this film is too cool for school. A <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>FLASH GORDON </b></i>Ming Ring sound effect won't get by me unnoticed. Nor does the word "Bob-Omb" as in Scott's band, Sex Bob-Omb, because Super Mario is still the cat's ass. There's probably a Wiki on all of the references in this flick. Let me check... Yep.<br />
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The fight sequences are awesome and the actors clearly trained a great deal to pull off their own stunts.<br />
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The very un-P.C. slap to the vegan community was LOL all day long.<br />
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Winstead as Ramona Flowers was top notch, but runner up for best supporting character goes to Keiran Culkin as Scott's gay roommate, Wallace. An unexpectedly bitchin' performance.<br />
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Cera is hysterical. Hysterical. The kid has some type of freaky comedic timing and a dry sense of humor that always seems to be one step ahead of even the quickest wittiest fuck.<br />
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The special effects could have easily been extremely obnoxious but were brilliantly handled by Wright. Directing-wise, Wright leveled up as every aspect from soundscape to cameos (Hello Thomas Jane, I see you there.) enhanced the characters, the film and the narrative.<br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>SPLATTER FACTOR</b></div>None. Unless you include your opponent's complete destruction by bursting into a shitload of coins gory. I'd call it radical.<br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>THE KILLSHOT</b></div>With the surprising low box office numbers, <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>SPVTW</b></i> is certainly destined to become a cult classic that gains a huge following later in it's life. This film is beloved by most critics and movie geeks alike, garnering acclaim by nearly everyone who comes into contact with it. Any negative reviews of the film I've read are given by 40+ year olds and not to bash the old folks, but this film is over their heads. Let's call it a cultural block. Parents just don't understand. The few that have dismissed the film as "hipster" haven't seen it or they would realize that <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>SPVTW</b></i> ridicules the hipster mentality quite voraciously. Wright anchors the film by keeping you invested in the characters, their honesty and their relationships with one another as he continuously surprises the audience by treating us as the media-savvy bunch we are. This gives <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>SPVTW</b></i> the freedom to destroy the confines of traditional Hollywood and actually electrify your oculars with something truly unique. This flick encapsulates and satirizes the temperament of the modern youth, defining it in a way that I don't think another movie will duplicate or better. <i style="color: #45818e;"><b>SPVTW</b></i> is a generation defining movie and like many great pieces of filmic art, will be appreciated as such in hindsight. In the meantime, I will definitely be headed down to the theatre to experience this movie again before it's gone. Fact: This is a film most will catch down the line and be sorry they missed on the big screen and that is a fucking epic fail. KRAKOWWWW!!! Perfect K.O.!!!<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/THWIucGAymI/AAAAAAAAAKY/bJmmHECi9Fs/s1600/ScottPilgrim3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/THWIucGAymI/AAAAAAAAAKY/bJmmHECi9Fs/s320/ScottPilgrim3.jpg" /></a><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/THWIxn4mwrI/AAAAAAAAAKg/6DW9mpaoQmU/s1600/ScottPilgrim.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/THWIxn4mwrI/AAAAAAAAAKg/6DW9mpaoQmU/s320/ScottPilgrim.jpg" /></a></div>Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-23243740427219656802010-08-22T20:42:00.004-04:002011-04-18T06:26:50.138-04:00THE EXPENDABLES<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/TG2ga501vwI/AAAAAAAAAIo/zO7DJ5BArwE/s1600/Expendables.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/TG2ga501vwI/AAAAAAAAAIo/zO7DJ5BArwE/s320/Expendables.jpg" /></a></div><span style="color: #666666;">Rated</span> <b><span style="color: red;">R</span></b><br />
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<span style="color: lime;">DIRECTOR:</span><span style="background-color: black; color: #666666;"> Sylvester Stallone</span><br />
<span style="color: lime;">STARRING:</span> <span style="color: #666666;">Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, Eric Roberts, Randy Couture, Steve Austin, Gary Daniels, Terry Crews, Mickey Rourke, Testosterone</span><br />
<span style="color: lime;">WRITTEN BY:</span> <span style="color: #666666;">Sylvester Stallone, David Callaham</span><br />
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<i style="color: lime;"><b>CRITICAL SCORE:</b></i> <b style="color: red;">6</b> <span style="color: #666666;">/ 10</span><br />
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<i style="color: lime;"><b>BULLET POINTS:</b></i> <b><span style="color: red;">7 </span></b><span style="color: #666666;">/ 10</span><br />
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</div><div style="color: red;"><b>PLOT</b></div><div style="color: #999999;">Sly and his band of mercenaries are hired by Bruce Willis to overthrow a dictator (backed by a corrupt U.S. Agent and his cronies - played by Eric Roberts, Steve Austin and Gary Daniels) in a foreign country, are double-crossed and the motherfuckin' diarrhea shits blast all up in the proverbial fan.</div><br />
<b style="color: red;">TRAILER TRASH</b><br />
<div style="color: #999999;">After seeing the trailers, I wasn't as hype about this flick as my friends. I thought <i style="color: #990000;"><b>THE EXPENDABLES</b></i> looked okay, but that it was probably going to be another let down with slick camera work, watered down action, too much CGI and lame fight sequences not involving the main cast actually fighting one another. I basically thought these guys were going to beat a bunch of extras to death while trying to look cool and save face. So, did I clock that bitch in the sweet spot or did <i style="color: #990000;"><b>THE EXPENDABLES</b></i> actually snarl its upper lip and deliver a beating to it's audience like the red-headed stepchildren they are?! </div><br />
<div style="color: red;"><b>LOCK AND LOAD</b></div><span style="color: #999999;">Listen up all men, hermaphrodites, cross-dressers and anyone(thing) with a pair of danglies. It is your fucking duty as a ball swinger to get your pansy-ass to the theatre and see </span><i style="color: #990000;"><b>THE EXPENDABLES</b></i><span style="color: #999999;">. If you're a chick, and you have more cojones then your dude, I implore you to shake your little ass over to your local cinema, make numbnuts go with you and he might stop "borrowing" your eyeliner and skinny jeans.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;">Look, <i style="color: #990000;"><b>THE EXPENDABLES</b></i> isn't going to be accused of having an intricate plot, underlying themes or subtle nuanced performances that exemplify the range of human emotions. The plot gets you from A to B to ass whoopin' C and the performances are solid from Stallone, Rourke, Statham, Lundgren, Austin, Li and Roberts. All you need to know about <i style="color: #990000;"><b>THE EXPENDABLES</b></i> is that it is a rock hard, adrenaline fueled action flick that actually delivers abundantly on it's promise to kick your teeth right out of your pouty girl mouth. The fights are well-choreographed without losing their raw edge. The car chases, aerial combat, weapon discharges and explosions are chiseled with thunderous hammer-claps that will make your man-tooth rattle. Come to think of it, the sound department did a great job on this flick. From set up to pay off, <i style="color: #990000;"><b>THE EXPENDABLES</b></i> delivers a dumptruck of muscle bound carnage and that, my friends, is a rarity in this day and age of emasculated, nutless action flicks. </span><br />
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</div><div style="color: red;"><b>PICKING BONES</b></div><span style="color: #999999;">Randy Couture is not an actor, nor a public speaker... nor someone who should have lines. He is painfully awful and kind of a waste of space in this flick as his skills weren't really even showcased.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;">Terry Crews is just bad. I don't mean bad as in good. I mean bad as in shitpile atrocious.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;">Eric Roberts wasn't convincing nor did his character have sufficient motive to not just walk away. The fault lies twofold, with the actor's shallow performance and the script. Also, a main villain that can actually maim a lion with his bare hands would have been a better choice. Which leads me to my next point...</span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;">His name is Jean Claude Van Damme and somebody somewhere fucking failed miserably by not securing him for this film. If they do a sequel, JCVD is a must have.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;">Furthermore, Michael Jai White, Kurt Russell, Wesley Snipes, Mark Dacascos, Triple H & Vin Diesel.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;">This film was in desperate desperate need of the fairer sex in full display. Truth.</span><br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>BREAKING BONES</b></div><span style="color: #999999;">Stone Cold VS Stallone</span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;">Gary Daniels VS Jet Li & Jason Statham</span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;">Dolph Lundgren VS Jet Li</span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;">The AA12 Assault Shotgun used by Terry Crews character in the finale hallway scene. FUUUUUUUUCK.</span><br />
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<b>SPLATTER FACTOR</b></div><span style="color: #999999;">Dismemberment, broken bones, lacerations, stabbings, guttings, people blown in half, people blown up entirely, decapitations, bullet wounds, head shots... destruction incarnate and hemoglobin spewed to and fro like a jet of piss from a racehorse.</span><br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>THE KILLSHOT</b></div><span style="color: #999999;">To a society that is hellbent on emasculating men, that compares a man who actually hits the gym and has shoulders to the trashbag dipshits on 'Jersey Shore' (because apparently having muscle is only for people with low IQ's and bad taste) and to a media who would have you believe that the preferred version of a man is more akin to one of the fruitcakes off of 'Gossip Girl' over, say, Jason Statham - I say fuck yourself and so does <b style="color: #990000;"><i>THE EXPENDABLES</i></b>. </span><span style="color: #999999;">The fact that 40% of the audience going to see <i style="color: #990000;"><b>THE EXPENDABLES</b></i> has been women speaks volumes. </span><span style="color: #999999;"> On a side note: Thank you Mr. Statham for trying to keep a man's action movie somewhat relevant in this day and age. <i style="color: #990000;"><b>THE EXPENDABLES</b></i> is here to help you remember what escapist action-packed entertainment is for someone with testosterone. This movie is not meant to be clever or deep. <i style="color: #990000;"><b>THE EXPENDABLES</b></i> is a breed of film that is sorely missed and frankly, not something that I thought I'd see again at the theatre. This flick almost works on a throwback Grindhouse type of level because it's point of view remains locked in the 80's, yet it has a modern edge with its use of the medium. I loved this film for the most part, with all of it's flaws. Every kick, punch and gunshot has a conviction behind it that a lot of modern films don't and although it misses the mark in it's misuse (or lack of use) of some characters, there are definitely worthy match ups that don't disappoint. </span><span style="color: #999999;"><i style="color: #990000;"><b>THE EXPENDABLES</b></i> is a great time, if for nothing else, than for pure nostalgia. Go. See it. Rediscover your nutsack. </span><span style="color: #999999;"></span><span style="color: #999999;"></span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-qJT2VUgeVr0/TawR3SmgZ7I/AAAAAAAAAOU/SlhX2709o54/s1600/ExpendablesMexican.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-qJT2VUgeVr0/TawR3SmgZ7I/AAAAAAAAAOU/SlhX2709o54/s320/ExpendablesMexican.jpg" width="216" /></a></div><span style="color: #999999;"><br />
</span>Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-74980419695031702562010-08-16T09:40:00.007-04:002011-04-18T06:27:48.059-04:00THE RUNAWAYS<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/TFcSCbNP5LI/AAAAAAAAAHs/uz96qvtnTdM/s1600/Runaways2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/TFcSCbNP5LI/AAAAAAAAAHs/uz96qvtnTdM/s320/Runaways2.jpg" /></a></div><span style="color: #f1c232;">Rated <span style="color: red;">R</span></span><span style="color: #f1c232;"><br />
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<span style="color: #f1c232;"><span style="color: lime;">DIRECTOR:</span> Floria Sigismondi</span><br />
<span style="color: #f1c232;"><span style="color: lime;">STARRING:</span> Kristen Stewart, Dakota Fanning</span><br />
<span style="color: #f1c232;"><span style="color: lime;">WRITTEN BY:</span> Floria Sigismondi</span><br />
<span style="color: #f1c232;">(Based on the book '<span style="color: magenta;">Neon Angel</span>' by: Cherie Currie)</span><br />
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<span style="color: #f1c232;"><i style="color: lime;"><b>CRITICAL SCORE:</b></i> <b style="color: red;">7</b> / 10</span><br />
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<span style="color: #f1c232;"><i style="color: lime;"><b>BULLET POINTS: </b></i><b style="color: red;">8</b> / 10</span><br />
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</div><div style="color: red;"><b>PLOT</b></div><span style="color: #f1c232;">A coming-of-age biopic about the pioneering 70's teenage all girls rock band, The Runaways; specifically centered around Cherie Currie and Joan Jett.</span><br />
<span style="color: #f1c232;"> </span><br />
<div style="color: red;"><b>TRAILER TRASH</b></div><span style="color: #f1c232;">Last year I happened on a little gem of a film from 1980 called <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>FOXES </b></i>which starred a teenage Jodie Foster. Foster is, of course, good in <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>FOXES</b></i>, however the breakout performance came from someone I had never heard of; Cherie Currie. So engaging was Cherie in the film, I was compelled to learn more about her and thus read all about her past in the jailbait supergroup, The Runaways. Literally a week later, news that a film based on Cherie's book 'Neon Angel' had been cast and it would star the incomparable Dakota Fanning as Cherie. I was skeptical whether the first time director, Floria Sigismondi, could deliver a film that did justice to The Runaways legacy and to Cherie's life. From everything I had read about the production and from Sigismondi herself, I knew this was going to be a film made with a ton of passion and respect for the source. That combined with great casting meant I was pulling for this flick to live up to its inspiration. So, was <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>THE RUNAWAYS</b></i> a homely prude, or was it 'the girl next door, the fox I'd been waiting for?'...</span><br />
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<b>LOCK AND LOAD</b></div><span style="color: #f1c232;">This film is all about women. I don't mean women the way us men see them through our testosterone filter. This isn't a hairy armpit feminist bra burning man-hating preachy girl power film. There is no heavy-handed agenda on display. </span><span style="color: #f1c232;">The bullshit parameters placed on women in the film's time period combined with how The Runaways overcome and/or fail against the odds, drugs and sexism that plagued (still does) the rock scene is shown rather objectively, which is refreshing. </span><span style="color: #f1c232;"><i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>THE RUNAWAYS</b></i> clearly showcases how this touted "Jail-bait Rock Group" willfully participates in taking advantage of perpetuating the mythos concerning "what men really want" and giving the middle-finger to "their place is society", along with some hella-solid tunes and how that earned them success. The disappointing and unfortunate experiences with men in their families and social lives and how this has shaped their view of men is apparent, but by no means makes these characters hateful. <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>THE RUNAWAYS</b></i> simply shows Cherie's and Joan's experiences without preaching and that in itself is what makes this movie and band compelling. That, and the fact that Fowley and The Runaways purposefully used sexism as a tool for success and a weapon against the ignorant is fucking awesome. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #f1c232;">The very first shot of <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>THE RUNAWAYS</b></i> is poetically abrasive and is one of those rare openings that really sums up a hell of a lot about one of the major themes this film tackles. I'm not going to give it away. Just recognize that it is awesome and if you don't think so, you are probably a moron. The direction of Sigismondi is largely felt in the performances of the actors as well as the tactful treatment of the subject matter. Kudos Floria. The cinematography, design and costuming work beautifully in tangent to really transport you into the time period. Fanning, Stewart and Shannon do an exceptional job at bringing the essence of these people to the screen.</span><br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>PICKING BONES</b></div><span style="color: #f1c232;">The script is predictable and keeps the movie from greatness. There were certainly some issues brought up in the film that weren't explored deep enough and some that were barely explored at all; one of these being the sexual relationship between Cherie and Joan. There are some subtle hints here and there that lead us into the scene that the pervos, no doubt, love, but that's not what I'm talking about. The sex scene is handled with class, probably only achievable by a woman director, especially Sigismondi. I wanted more substance in the script, either before and/or after the act, so that the exploration of these 2 characters affinity for, and competitive spirit with, one another creates enough tumultuousness to strike a chord. I wanted more dynamics and dichotomy in Currie and Jett's relationship and the script doesn't achieve that or give the audience those opportunities.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #f1c232;">Some of the supporting cast just doesn't connect. Not enough time is spent with all of The Runaways, together, as a group.</span><br />
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<div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #f1c232;">There are people that think that this movie is inappropriate. I don't think it was inappropriate enough. The tone of the film keeps it's target audience in mind and I can't necessarily fault it for that. But, for me it lacked a rawness necessary in relating the seedy and gritty reality The Runaways lived through. By glossing some things over, the impact is lost. </span><b><br />
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</div><div style="color: red;"><b>BREAKING BONES</b></div><span style="color: #f1c232;">Sigismondi's previous experience directing music videos comes in quite handy, giving <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>THE RUNAWAYS </b></i>great pacing, a wonderful vintage / modern look and the ability to take the audience into the hazy disjointed feel and surreality of the drug user. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #f1c232;">Fanning is fearless in her portrayal of Currie and brings an electricity to every scene she's in. The actress perfectly captures her character in every way, from physicality to essence. Also, her perfect recreation of the famous show The Runaways play in Japan is not only awesome, it's creepy accurate. Ch,Ch,Ch,Ch,Cherry Bomb!</span><br />
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<span style="color: #f1c232;">Dear Kristen Stewart haters - Pull your head out of your ass. The girl is not her <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>TWILIGHT</b></i> character. Go watch <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>THE CAKE EATERS</b></i> and tell me that Kristen Stewart isn't dynamic and doesn't have some serious acting chops and I won't tell you to slather yourself in gasoline and play with matches. Bottom line - Stewart is Joan Jett, with all her spirit and nuance, pulling off an awesome performance. If you think that this is an easy task, you clearly know 2 things about acting: Jack and Shit.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #f1c232;">Michael Shannon, you are a badass... once again. Perverted, inspiring, maniacal, oogey and brilliant isn't an easy combination to pull off and Shannon's intense portrayal of Kim Fowley brings that to the table and serves that bitch a 5 course meal.</span><br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>SPLATTER FACTOR</b></div><span style="color: #f1c232;">Remember that first shot in the film I alluded to... heheheheheh.</span><br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>THE KILLSHOT</b></div><span style="color: #f1c232;">I don't know if <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>THE RUNAWAYS</b></i> necessarily 'had me and grabbed me til I was sore' but it certainly put in the effort. Yes, the script is pretty mediocre and predictable. <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>ALMOST FAMOUS</b></i> this isn't. Fact is, I was thoroughly entertained and Sigismondi rocked it out for a first time director. The performances are spot on compelling and Fanning, Stewart and Shannon go above and beyond a simple skin deep interpretation of their real-life counter parts </span><span style="color: #f1c232;">and turn in brilliant performances in their respective roles. </span><span style="color: #f1c232;">These 3 actors breathe life into their characters and transcend <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>THE RUNAWAYS</b></i> bland script. This movie is a bit more style than substance at times, but that kind of epitomizes the band, The Runaways, themselves. It's sex, drugs and rock n' roll, baby, and it's from the feminine perspective. How can you not dig that? </span><span style="color: #f1c232;">I suppose if you're easily offended or think women should "know their place", you will not like this flick. Of course, if you think that, I would consider relocating to another planet. I would also consider you an asshole. In my book, there's nothing sexier than an independent and passionate woman who isn't afraid to go after what she wants and <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>THE RUNAWAYS</b></i> oozes that essence from every frame.</span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-u2Fyg1q951o/TawSGU0Xe6I/AAAAAAAAAOY/Ib4mxApdUDs/s1600/Runaways1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-u2Fyg1q951o/TawSGU0Xe6I/AAAAAAAAAOY/Ib4mxApdUDs/s320/Runaways1.jpg" width="216" /></a></div>Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-60822797038765866182010-07-26T14:34:00.002-04:002011-03-19T17:08:43.247-04:00INCEPTION<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/TE21H1Cv2YI/AAAAAAAAAHM/MG9-X3l46XU/s1600/Inception.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/TE21H1Cv2YI/AAAAAAAAAHM/MG9-X3l46XU/s320/Inception.jpg" /></a></div><span style="color: #0b5394;">Rated</span> <span style="color: red;">PG-13</span><br />
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<span style="color: lime;">DIRECTOR:</span> <span style="color: #0b5394;">Christopher Nolan</span><br />
<span style="color: lime;">STARRING: </span><span style="color: #0b5394;">Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ellen Page</span><br />
<span style="color: lime;">WRITTEN BY:</span> <span style="color: #0b5394;">Christopher Nolan</span><br />
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<b><i style="color: lime;">CRITICAL SCORE:</i> <span style="color: red;">9</span> <span style="color: #0b5394;">/ 10</span></b><br />
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<b><i style="color: lime;">BULLET POINTS:</i> <span style="color: red;">9</span> <span style="color: #0b5394;">/ 10</span></b><br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>PLOT</b></div><div style="color: #3d85c6;">In the world of high stakes corporate espionage, Dom Cobb is a thief hired to extract vital information from the subconscious of his targets by hijacking their dreams. He is given a last chance to clear his name and get his life back if he can accomplish the near impossible task of inception; planting an idea in his target's mind.</div><br />
<div style="color: red;"><b>TRAILER TRASH</b></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Christopher Nolan has directed some of my favorite films starring my favorite actors (<i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>MEMENTO</b></i> with Guy Pearce, <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>THE DARK KNIGHT</b></i> with Heath Ledger) and is fast becoming a director that I would put into the prestigious category of "Untouchable". It was no surprise to me that the trailer for <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION </b></i>damn near gave me chills, pandering to some of my favorite subjects, actors and genres. I've always been a huge fan of Leonardo DiCaprio and have, as of late, been more and more impressed with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Cillian Murphy. <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION </b></i>was easily the movie I pined for and anticipated the most this summer, looking to be the rare combination of an intelligent, thought-provoking, mindfuck entertainment slap in the mouth summer 2010 has needed. That said, I am largely disappointed when having any high expectation at all before seeing a flick, so I sat down, albeit a bit giddy, more than a tad cynical as well. Let's face it, this summer has been pretty sucktacular as far as quality of film is concerned. I honestly sat down hoping for the best and expecting the worst. Let's see how Nolan's pet project stacks up.</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><a name='more'></a><br />
</span></div><div style="color: red;"><b>LOCK AND LOAD</b></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Before we get started, I'm not here to discuss the plot itself. I have my theories on the end, some of the clues I think I have found concerning such and will gladly beat your ass in verbal martial arts about all of it, but so as not to give anything away in my review, I'm going to refrain from specific convo about specific plot points. If you wanna' gab, let's do it in the 'Comments' section. Boom. Moving on...</span></div><div style="color: red;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">From cinematography to script, A to Z, <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION</b></i> is easily the most solid film I have seen in a very long time. It is this quality and type of film that made me fall in love with movies. <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION </b></i>is a breath of crisp, clean, fresh air that American film is in dire need of. Nolan is playing his A game (does this guy play any other?) and the rest of the cast is up to the challenge.</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">The action sequences are tight, suspenseful and massively entertaining. Alone, the anti-gravity fight scene with Joseph Gordon-Levitt is a masters class in film-making. The script and characters keep you moving along at a brisk and inspiring pace. I would be shocked if this film isn't nominated for an Oscar in the editing category. </span></div><div style="color: red;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">One of my favorite aspects of <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION </b></i>is that it doesn't slow down to let you catch up or beat you over the head with the repetition of the ideas it presents. With this flick, Nolan kind of reminds me of one of my absolute favorite directors, Stanley Kubrick. Plot-wise, you either get it or you don't. Christopher Nolan has the class to actually treat the audience with respect and do something most Hollywood films do not; expect you to be intelligent. Don't get me wrong. I enjoy a good solid entertainment piece as much (maybe more) than a lot of people but <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION </b></i>is a film that challenges to do more than just look good. <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION </b></i>is an intelligent film for an intelligent audience and will certainly leave some people behind as it twists and turns and folds over itself. This leads me to my one and only problem with this film.</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: red;"><b>PICKING BONES</b></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">The headiness of <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION</b></i>, intriguing as it is, fails to emotionally balance itself with something that tugs on the heart strings. The characters of 'Mal' (a stunning performance by Marion Cotillard) and 'Dom' (DiCaprio), their interactions and storyline as strong as they are, just didn't entwine me as much as I wanted them to. I wanted to feel more for these two, especially when that key scene toward the end concerning these two beautifully constructed characters occurs. Alas, I didn't connect but I do know those who were affected emotionally by this aspect of the movie. For whatever reason, <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION </b></i>didn't fondle me on that level and is literally the only thing that keeps it from a perfect score for me.</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: red;"><b>BREAKING BONES</b></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Everything is amazing in this flick. I'm not blowing smoke up your ass. From the costumes, the acting, the script, the direction, the cinematography, the subject matter, the treatment of the audience, the dialogue - there is almost nothing I can point out that is better than the rest because as a whole, <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION </b></i>damn near does it all with blissful perfection. Hell, I bet the catering on this flick is Oscar worthy.</span></div><div style="color: red;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Loved Cillian Murphy as 'The Mark'.</span></div><div style="color: red;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;"></span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Joseph Gordon-Levitt, I'm joining your fan club.</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Tom Hardy, you charismatic son of a bitch! Now, I <i>really </i>can't wait to see you as 'Max' in the upcoming testerone orgasm man flick <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>MAD MAX: FURY ROAD</b></i>!!!</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">The last shot of the film = cinematic genius.</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: red;"><b>SPLATTER FACTOR</b></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">A little sauce here and there, like a finely tuned recipe of delicious mayhem. Tis' largely unnecessary for this film and wasn't missed in the slightest, Bucko.</span></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: red;"><b>THE KILLSHOT</b></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Put on your thinking cap and prepare yourself for a movie that is beyond entertaining. Though a bit brainy for your average moviegoer, <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION </b></i>is second to none and near perfection with its provocative perspective, compelling cast, absorbing cinematography and top notch directing. <b><i><span style="color: #a64d79;">INCEPTION </span></i></b>is gripping, oddly magnetic and is nothing less than captivating. This is easily my favorite film of 2010 and I don't mind telling you that if you disagree, you can email me at IDONTGIVEAFUCK@gmail.com. <i style="color: #a64d79;"><b>INCEPTION </b></i>is tops. Pun intended. </span></div>Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3508382538947600421.post-64883155420106960912010-07-20T17:39:00.006-04:002011-03-19T17:07:45.236-04:00PREDATORS<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/TEDjXm6xDOI/AAAAAAAAAFs/r18xQl8rCjQ/s1600/Predators-EDIT.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/TEDjXm6xDOI/AAAAAAAAAFs/r18xQl8rCjQ/s320/Predators-EDIT.jpg" /></a></div><div style="color: red;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b></b></span></div><span style="color: #999999;"><span style="color: lime;"><span style="color: #999999;">Rated</span> <span style="color: red;">R</span></span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #999999;"><span style="color: lime;">DIRECTOR:</span> Nimrod Antal</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;"><span style="color: lime;">STARRING:</span> Adrien Brody, Alice Braga</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;"><span style="color: lime;">WRITTEN BY:</span> Alex Litvak, Michael Finch</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;"> </span><b><span style="color: #999999;"><i style="color: lime;"> </i></span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #999999;"><i style="color: lime;">CRITICAL SCORE:</i> <span style="color: red;">6 <span style="color: #666666;">/ 10</span></span></span></b><br />
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<div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #999999;"><b><i><span style="color: lime;">BULLET POINTS:</span> </i> <span style="color: red;">7 <span style="color: #666666;">/ 10</span></span></b></span><b> </b></div><div style="color: red;"><br />
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<b>PLOT</b></div><div style="color: #cccccc;">A goulash of bad asses are dropped (literally) on a game preserve planet and hunted down for sport by an alien race of predators.</div><br />
<div style="color: red;"><b>TRAILER TRASH</b></div><span style="color: #cccccc;">John McTiernan's 1987 slice of kickass known as <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATOR </b></i>is one of my absolute favorite flicks ever put to celluloid and holds the special honor of being the movie I paid to watch at the theater more times than any other film. That is a tough act to follow for any sequel, but I find <b><i style="color: #6fa8dc;">PREDATOR 2</i> </b>to be quite underrated and a pretty damned solid entry into the Predator Franchise. Yes, <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>AVP </b></i>was pretty awful and although <b><i style="color: #6fa8dc;">AVP: REQUIEM</i> </b>stepped it's game up a couple of notches on the entertainment scale, both flicks are severely lacking and didn't deliver the goods for most fans. As a Predator geek, I think most of us were happy just to have another Predator film delivered to our mandibles for consumption, much less one produced by genre fave, Robert Rodriguez. However, after the buzz of pre-release euphoria wore off, it was time to sit down in that dark cold theater with my Reeses Pieces in hand and finally see whether or not <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS </b></i>actually delivered on it's hype and on it's own as a film. As Jesse Ventura's character Blain might say, "Let's lock and load you slack-jawed faggots because it's time to let ol' painless out of the bag!"</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cccccc;"><b style="color: red;">LOCK AND LOAD</b> </span><br />
<span style="color: #cccccc;">Before I could oil up my biceps and light a stoagie, <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS </b></i>takes off from the first frame, hellbent on delivering some adrenalin. Litvak's script combined with Antal's direction make tight entertaining work of the first third of this film. With the exception of Brody, my first impressions of the rest of our main group of players was that they were a bit formulaic. However, that was easily countered by a pretty solid cast of actors, great pacing and some beautiful cinematography by Gyul Pados. And, while we're on the subject of cinematography, much has been made of the shot of Brody being light raped by multiple Predator sites that is in the trailer but not actually in the film. I understand Rodriguez's stance on having shots for the trailer that embody the movie without giving away too much to the audience. Frankly, trailers today by and large suck and give too much away, so I completely agree with that stance. That said, the specific shot in question was used as a hook to get asses in seats and the fact that not only is the shot misleading in the context of the film, but outright impossible, means that the hook misrepresented the movie. Of course, there is going to be ire raised and backlash from that. Moving on...</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cccccc;"><i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS </b></i>begins to fall apart in the second act, largely because the plot falls prey to it's own self-aware formula and shallow characters. With the exception of "the dogs" and a scene involving Danny Trejo, Antal fails to build any palpable suspense or originality as our ragtag group begins to dwindle. The odd insertion of Lawrence Fishburne into the plot gives us a nice unexpected left turn, as well as some good exposition, but altogether doesn't work. The believability of the 'Noland' character is squandered (due to script) and Fishburne's physical state adds to this loss (more on that in the "Picking Bones" section), rendering a good idea into something that just doesn't fit. The last third of the film along with it's finale delivers a solid punch to the audience's collective face with some nice action that won't disappoint fans. However, this flick ultimately fails to do anything unexpected. With the exception of an incredibly cool scene involving ChangChien's 'Hanzo' character blade fighting a Predator in a field (like some Kurosawa nightmare), and some aforementioned scenes above, <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS </b></i>lacks the one thing I thought it would accomplish quite easily: originality. And anyone remotely paying attention could have smelled Topher Grace's character turn a mile off. How much more interesting would it have been for this obvious bit of business to happen much earlier in the film and be unknown to the other characters as he picks them off from inside the group? Answer: Infinitely more interesting.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cccccc;">Plain and simply, <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS </b></i>is extremely derisive. Structurally, almost beat for beat, this film mimics the far superior original. A lot of directors today seem to misunderstand the concept of an homage and go right into the land of borrowing. A character line here or there, maybe an evocative shot, a piece of music are great ways to wink at the audience and help them recall some nostalgia. To do them all and do them repeatedly as well as using the same story structure is overkill. The concept for the film sounded very original on paper except that when it came to the execution of the concept, it was not done from an original perspective. The script and director places a group of fighters in a hostile jungle territory which is basically exactly the same plot as the original. Who gives a shit that you're on a different planet if nobody can tell 99% of the time? Small tweaks and minor variations don't hide the fact that the main plot thread is exactly the same. <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS </b></i>not only does a poor job of separating itself from the original but it constantly mimics it's influence which continually begs the audience to compare it to the original. This is extremely bad news for Antal and company because not only has the audience seen this film before, but it was done far better and was, for it's time, a fresh and inventive take. This leads me to my biggest problem with <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS</b></i>...</span><br />
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<b><span style="color: red;">PICKING BONES</span> <span style="color: yellow;">**SPOILERS**</span></b><span style="color: #cccccc;"> </span><br />
<span style="color: #cccccc;">The way the different races of Predator, or what I'll call the 'Blood Feud Storyline', was handled chapped my fuckin' hide and pissed off a lot fans of the original. Look, there's nothing wrong with the idea. However, all of the hype before the film was that <i><b><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">PREDATORS </span></b></i>was the sequel <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATOR </b></i>deserved and that's a fine and dandy opinion but it's a bit crass. Combine that with blatantly copying the original in a multitude of ways and then having an actual storyline that ties an "original" Predator up as captive, while spouting off that these new Predators were stronger, bigger, tougher and badder-ass, and then having your new Predator beat the ever-loving shit out of it and chop it's head off... Well, your heavy-handed metaphor didn't go over a lot of fans heads. It speaks of an ego problem, especially when the film does not back it up. To further argue the point: Schwarzenegger's infinitely cooler and tougher group of Special Forces Mercs was taken out by ONE of these things and three of your new and improved Predators couldn't get the job done on their own turf against a ragtag group of fighters who aren't even trained to work together is kind of pathetic in comparison. Just saying. Oh, and P.S. - Where the fuck is the gore in this flick? <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>AVP: REQUIEM</b></i> had more balls! I don't need a splatter fest, but when shit goes down, it needs to go down! Maybe they missed this point from the original? As well as the suspense? As well as the simplicity of the thing? Bottom line, the filmmaker is inferring that <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS </b></i>is bigger and badder than the original. Seriously? I say, "You're ghostin' us motherfucker. You spout that ego one more time, I'll bleed ya real quiet, leave ya here. Got That?" But, I digress...</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cccccc;">Lawrence Fishburne as 'Noland' was a fail. Sorry, but if you survived 10 seasons on the Predators game preserve planet, hiding out, killing Predators, surviving, scrounging for food, collecting shit, going batshit nuts - you would not be gelatinous. You would be cut out of iron and maybe even malnourished. You'd be fucking scary! Fishburne's 'Noland' is none of these things. Though the actor gets the crazy part down, the dangerous aspect is never there. Also, he gets killed like a bitch. Poor script strikes again. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #cccccc;">Topher Grace as 'Edwin' the psychopath just doesn't work. Grace does okay with his comical moments without making things schlocky but lacks the emotional (and possibly acting?) range to pull this character off. Also, his character turn comes way too late and is as obvious as fake mammories on a senior citizen. Damn script.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cccccc;"><b style="color: red;">BREAKING BONES</b> <b style="color: yellow;">**SPOILERS**</b></span><br />
<span style="color: #cccccc;">The bug infested alien thing that attempts to run down the Topher is actually based on the original design of the Predator. Stan Winston came in at the last minute and redesigned the creature into the mandible-faced fuck we all know and love. Yes, that is rad.</span><br />
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<div style="color: red;"><span style="color: #cccccc;">Adrien Brody is spot on as 'Royce' and pretty much makes this movie. This guy is good in everything. He trained like a beast for the role, lived in the jungle for a spell and gave up sex in order to "harness ferocity". The actor states, "I felt I needed to keep away from all distractions and all things that, erm... drain you, if you know what I mean." Yes, I think we get you... And I don't think I could argue with the results. </span><b> </b></div><div style="color: red;"><br />
</div><div style="color: red;"><b>SPLATTER FACTOR <span style="color: yellow;">**SPOILERS**</span></b></div><span style="color: #cccccc;"><i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS </b></i>misses the mark here big time. There's some decent glow in the dark Predator gush, but as far as straight out hardcore levity building blood baths, this film is lacking! We really could have used some sauce in the 'Hanzo' samurai fight scene for damn sure. The camera always seemed to pull away when anything too gruesome happened, BTFW, if you're going to rip out someone's spine with their head attached while they're still alive, for fuck's sake show it!! WTF all day long.</span><br />
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<div style="color: red;"><b>THE KILLSHOT<br />
</b></div><span style="color: #cccccc;">While very entertaining, <i><b><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">PREDATORS </span></b></i>struggles to do anything unique. This is not bad entry into the Predator Franchise in the least; much better than <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>AVP </b></i>or <i><b><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">AVP: REQUIEM</span></b></i>. However, <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS </b></i>leans far too much on the original and gets caught up in its own formula, failing at creating any type of suspense. Brody made awesome work of his character and I definitely had fun watching this film, especially the second time around. That said, I expect more from filmmakers than a by-the-numbers, take it or leave it, entertaining movie, especially when Rodriguez's name is attached. The original <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATOR</b></i><i><b>, </b></i>and <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATOR 2</b></i> as well, had an inventiveness to them that is sorely missing from <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATORS</b></i>. Unfortunately Antal's insistence on keeping the same plot-structure and constantly referencing the original, keeps his film predictable and comes off as being too repetitive and unoriginal. If these types of flicks aren't your cup of tea, then I suggest watching McTiernan's 1987 bowl of awesome, <i style="color: #6fa8dc;"><b>PREDATOR</b></i>, and leaving it at that. If Sci-Fi badassery is your thing, you'll definitely enjoy <i><b><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">PREDATORS </span></b></i>but it won't rip out your spine and put you in a trophy case like it should.</span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/THHWMQRr0LI/AAAAAAAAAJY/6bPDl1T1Y3A/s1600/Predators-EDIT2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7YvgoBVWIGU/THHWMQRr0LI/AAAAAAAAAJY/6bPDl1T1Y3A/s320/Predators-EDIT2.jpg" /></a></div>Chance Kelleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07957287079805433726noreply@blogger.com2